Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Schhol is site where the whole future of learners or children lies. There are too many ways for the students of learning from the primary schools. However, the fashion of formal learning is too odd. Many people argue that this is not good idea of formal learning currentlly. In my views, school and education system should be balanced covers formal as well as moderate learning and playing activies for the pupils.

Firstly, nows a days the formal learning is more than the moderate learning but it has not perk impact by learing moderate studies the students could able to face the issue and become more creative. But the formal is also vital for the pupils because it gives the information about the history and past.

Futhermore, the school should focus on the learners playing and enjoyable activies because it,s good for the children mind and health. It is key for pupils that thinks studies like fun not as pressure. It has good for parents that when their children take interest in sports then they wiil have more career opropturies. Beside this too much play activies are not good.

To sum up, there should be balance choice that children should face both moderate and formal learnimg. Also playing activies should set for the chidren in school but too much should be moderate.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt by expressing a view on formal learning and discussing the importance of play, but the ideas are limited and under-developed. For instance, the mention that formal learning gives 'information about the history and past' is extremely brief and lacks elaboration or supporting examples. Furthermore, the position is not always clearly maintained, as the terminology shifts confusingly between 'moderate learning' and formal learning without clear definitions. Crucially, the length requirement is not met, as the response contains only 221 words, falling short of the 250-word minimum. To reach a higher level, the writer needs to fully extend and support all parts of the task with relevant explanations and examples while meeting the required word count.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay displays some organization with basic paragraphing and general attempts to structure ideas chronologically, using transitional markers such as 'Firstly', 'Futhermore', and 'To sum up'. However, there is no clear overall progression, and the logical flow is hindered by awkward phrasing and confusing shifts between ideas. Cohesive devices are sometimes inadequate or repetitive, and referencing is occasionally unclear, such as when pronouns like 'it' refer ambiguously to preceding concepts. Paragraphing is attempted, but internal paragraph cohesion needs to be strengthened. To improve, the writer must ensure that ideas follow a clear logical sequence and that cohesive devices are used more naturally and accurately to link sentences and paragraphs together.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

Vocabulary is limited and minimally adequate for the task. The student relies on basic, repetitive vocabulary and makes frequent noticeable errors in word choice, spelling, and word form, such as 'Schhol', 'currentlly', 'activies', 'nows a days', and 'opropturies'. There are also awkward collocations and non-standard phrasing like 'perk impact' and 'moderate learning'. These lexical inaccuracies sometimes cause difficulty for the reader and impede smooth communication. To achieve a higher score, the writer needs to expand their lexical repertoire, incorporate a wider range of less common vocabulary with greater precision, and eliminate spelling and word-formation errors.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The grammar demonstrates a very limited range of structures, relying mostly on simple sentences alongside poorly controlled attempts at complex forms. There are frequent errors in verb forms, tenses, subject-verb agreement, articles, and prepositions within grammatical patterns. Examples of these frequent errors include 'school is site where', 'is not good idea', 'students could able to face', and 'children that thinks studies like fun'. These errors frequently cause difficulty for the reader. To improve, the writer must focus on increasing grammatical accuracy, mastering basic sentence patterns, and using complex structures with control rather than attempting them with frequent errors.

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