Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Some people believe that primary schools give more importance to the formal learning. I partly agree with this opinion because children need education, but they also need to play and enjoy the school life.

Firstly, formal learning is important for children. At the primary school, children learn the basic subjects like mathematics, English, and science. These subjects help children to build the strong foundation. They also gain more knowledge in this age. Their age is the development of different things and they can easily pick up steadily. However, if they spend too much time on their study, they feel tired. For example, young students may find it difficult to study for many hours without a break.

On the other hand, it is also important for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom. Different games help them to become more active and relax. When children take the rest after the work, they feel fresh and relaxed. Chldren play together and learn how to work as a team. They also develop the social skills and good communication in it. For instance, games help to maintain their good health and also make the physically fit and relax.

In conclusion, I believe that formal learning is important in primary schools, but children should also have enough time to play. A good balance between learning and playing can help children develop in a healthy and enjoyable way. Therefore, children should maintain both formal learning and play as well as learn in the primary school.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play in primary schools. A clear position is established in the introduction and maintained throughout the essay. However, some ideas are under-developed or repetitive. For example, while the writer mentions that games help children become more active and relaxed, this point is repeated in slightly different terms in the conclusion of the third paragraph rather than being extended with deeper analysis or a more detailed example. To move to a higher level, the response would need to fully develop all main ideas with richer elaboration rather than relying on brief supporting points.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear logical structure divided into an introduction, body paragraphs addressing each prompt question, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct points, such as the discussion on formal learning versus the benefits of play. Cohesive devices are employed to guide the reader, featuring linking phrases like 'Firstly', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion'. However, referencing and cohesion can sometimes feel mechanical or repetitive, such as the continuous reliance on basic transitional markers. Additionally, the final concluding sentence repeats earlier phrasing rather than effectively synthesizing the arguments. Greater flexibility in cohesive referencing and smoother transitions would elevate the organizational quality.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, successfully communicating the student's ideas regarding education and play. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary, such as 'build the strong foundation' and 'social skills and good communication', but these attempts are accompanied by noticeable inaccuracies in word choice, article use, and collocation. For instance, phrases like 'give more importance to the formal learning' and 'take the rest after the work' sound unnatural. Spelling is generally accurate, but limitations in lexical range and precision restrict the score. To improve, the student should focus on expanding their range of less common lexical items, improving collocational awareness, and refining word choice to ensure more natural and precise expression.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The writing demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, incorporating structures such as conditional and subordinate clauses, as seen in 'However, if they spend too much time on their study, they feel tired.' There are several errors in grammar and punctuation, particularly involving articles and plurals, such as 'At the primary school', 'in this age', and 'make the physically fit'. While these errors persist, they are not overly frequent and rarely impede overall communication. To achieve a higher band, the writer needs to demonstrate more consistent control over complex grammatical structures and eliminate recurring errors with articles, prepositions, and noun-form agreements to ensure a higher proportion of error-free sentences.

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