Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Mostly of the students starts learing from the primary school. Nowadays majority of schools mainly focus on formal learing such as learning theoritecal subject like Science, Maths and English instead of practical approach . I strongly agree that primary school focus too much on formal learning.

As formal way of education or learning can only give students basic idea regarding concept and majority of students finds hard to corp with such way of learning. Schools should teach their student and encourage them to play or do outdoor activities parallel of studying. Teacher should use practical approach in their teaching as it is help students to get better understanding about topic and easily memorized the learning. For example, while studying science the teachers should shows some basic experiments such as litmus paper test and elements dissolve in water; to their student to give clear idea about topic and where these experiments are used in real life.

In primary schools they must have fixed time for sport activities because it helps to be physically fit as solely mentally fit should not helps the childrens for their developments. Childrens should be developed in all manner which eventually helps them in their future. The first time childrens learns is from primary schools regarding to be in disciplined, how to talk to other person and complete their work on time so primary schools play important role in every children life.

In conclusion, primary schools should not solely focus on formal learning instead they should motivate and teach their childrens about benefits of playing differents activities which helps them to remain healthy in future.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, successfully discussing the focus on formal learning in primary schools, expressing a clear position of strong agreement, and considering the importance of play alongside study. However, some ideas are under-developed or lack full extension. For instance, while the writer mentions that formal learning only gives a 'basic idea regarding concept,' this point is not fully elaborated with deeper reasoning. Similarly, the example of science experiments, such as the 'litmus paper test,' is relevant but remains somewhat brief. To reach a higher level, the writer needs to expand further on how play enhances cognitive and social development, providing fully developed supporting arguments throughout the body paragraphs.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a recognisable introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, successfully guiding the reader through the writer's stance. Paragraphing is used to separate main ideas, such as the discussion on teaching methods in the second paragraph and physical fitness in the third. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical or faulty. The transitions between sentences can feel abrupt, and referencing is not always clear, as seen with phrases like 'such way of learning' and 'these experiments' where the precise antecedent is slightly loose. To improve, the writer should employ a wider and more flexible range of cohesive devices to link ideas more smoothly and ensure referencing is consistently precise.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, providing enough terms to communicate the main arguments about formal learning and play. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary, such as 'practical approach,' 'outdoor activities,' and 'physically fit.' However, there are noticeable limitations in lexical range and precision, alongside word-choice and word-form errors that occasionally cause strain for the reader. For example, 'Mostly of the students starts learing' contains word-choice issues, and 'theoritecal subject' and 'learing' show spelling mistakes. Additionally, phrases like 'solely mentally fit' and 'differents activities' demonstrate inaccuracies in collocation and word form. To achieve a higher score, the writer must expand their lexical repertoire and use less common vocabulary with greater accuracy and stylistic awareness.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The text demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting complex structures such as conditional or relative clauses like 'as it is help students to get better understanding' and 'where these experiments are used.' There are frequent errors in grammar, including subject-verb agreement issues ('majority of schools mainly focus,' 'majority of students finds'), missing or incorrect articles ('a clear idea,' 'in every children life'), and incorrect verb forms ('teachers should shows'). Punctuation also lacks consistency in places. These errors require some effort from the reader to interpret the intended meaning. To progress, the writer needs to improve grammatical control, ensuring greater accuracy in verb tenses, subject-verb agreement, and article usage when attempting complex sentence structures.

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