Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

There is a ongoing debate about the method of teaching in schools should be changed. Few individuals believe that primary school focus only in fixed curriculum without any lectures of physical activity. I firmly agree that primary schools should not focus in only formal learning.

To commence with the reason of my agreement, if schools only focus on teaching then eventually students will lose interest. To be more precise, students can not focus in only learning subjects like science, mathematics etc. if students are learning this subjects only through out the day then students will get tired and can not concentrate in studying. For instance, a school has fixed schedule with subject like science, mathematics, history and student have to follow that schedule daily. Due to that students will get bore and lose interest in some of the subject. As a result, by focusing in only formal learning may effect the students preference and their academic performance.

On the other hand, to overcome this issue school should add some time for playing for learners in its curriculum. To elaborate further, a play can assist students to not get bored during classes as well as it can help students to refresh their minds. I believe that schools should do few playing activity which can help students to be creative. To exemplify, a teacher can use a simple team game to teach children basic mathematics or vocabulary. Children may remember the information more easily because they are actively involved rather than simply listening to a lesson. Thus, combining play with formal learning can create a more enjoyable classroom and support children's academic and personal development.

In recapitulate, primary schools should balance formal learning with play to support children’s academic, social, creative, and physical development.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, expressing a clear position on formal learning and explaining the importance of play in primary schools. The ideas presented are generally relevant, fulfilling the criteria for the band and showing early elements of the next level by presenting a balanced argument. However, some ideas remain under-developed or somewhat repetitive, such as the discussion on boredom in the second paragraph, where explanations tend to circle the same point rather than expanding with deeper analysis or varied examples. To reach a higher level, the writer needs to fully extend all supporting arguments with more robust reasoning and detailed real-world examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear attempt at logical progression. The writer uses standard cohesive devices to structure the text, such as 'To commence with', 'On the other hand', and 'In recapitulate'. However, cohesion is at times mechanical or faulty, as seen with the awkward phrasing 'In recapitulate' instead of 'To recapitulate' or 'In conclusion'. Paragraphing is used sufficiently to divide the introduction, body points, and conclusion, but referencing and transitions between sentences can occasionally feel repetitive or simplistic. To improve, the writer should employ a wider and more natural variety of cohesive markers and ensure seamless transitions between ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, successfully communicating the writer's main points. There are attempts to use less common vocabulary and phrases related to education, such as 'curriculum', 'academic performance', and 'personal development'. However, noticeable limitations and inaccuracies in word choice, word form, and collocation are present throughout the text. Examples include writing 'focus only in' instead of 'focus only on', 'get bore' instead of 'get bored', 'this subjects' instead of 'these subjects', and 'playing activity' instead of 'play activities' or 'physical activities'. These lexical slips reflect an adequate range for an intermediate level, but to achieve a higher score, the writer must demonstrate greater precision in word formation and natural collocation.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The writer demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures such as conditional sentences ('if schools only focus on teaching then eventually students will lose interest') and relative clauses. There are several grammatical errors in verb forms, articles, and prepositions within grammatical patterns, such as 'There is a ongoing debate' instead of 'an ongoing debate', 'method of teaching in schools should be changed', and 'effect the students preference' instead of 'affect the students' preferences'. Despite these errors, meaning is rarely impeded, and the sentence structures remain generally comprehensible. To progress, the writer needs to increase grammatical control and produce a higher frequency of error-free complex sentences.

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