Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

I believe early childhood developments are mostly rely on playing. Children learn and develop their physical, intellectual, emotional and social aspects through playing. Nowadays the montessori education is well structured. For instance AMI and MMI are the most prominent current styles of teaching. Those methods focus on congrete form that using solid shapes, and other toys to teach the children.

Handcrafts are the creative way for developing children's fine motor skills. Aditionally When they touch glue and hold scissor it helps to enhace their sensory development. Education toys are the another way to increase children's abilities and those can be prefereble way of learning for them. They intend to explore when opportunities are provided for them.

Focusing merely on papers and pencils won't be the strategy to evaluate their academic performance.

Early period of life has the significant role where the brain has its rapid growth. More than 90% of brain development occurs before 6 yeas of life. So, traditional learning methods would negatively impact and hindrace the children from learning the potential skills to shape their future.

Finally the step by step approach could help the children to move slowly from congrete to abstract way. After the child improves his/her fine motor skills to hold a pencil through playing. The child can be provided with the pencil and paper to start witing. But it could start from patterns and shapes which child can trace easily. The letter formation can be taught later once they are capable for turn the pencil as the letters are written in the alphabet.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by presenting a clear position on formal learning and discussing the importance of play in primary classrooms. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While the introduction mentions Montessori methods and the body paragraphs touch on fine motor skills and brain development, some points remain under-developed or lack specific explanation. For instance, the reference to AMI and MMI is introduced without being fully connected back to the prompt regarding the extent of agreement on formal learning. To reach the next level, the writer needs to extend and support all main ideas with more thorough explanations and relevant examples rather than moving quickly between disparate points.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a recognisable progression of ideas, moving from general early childhood development to specific motor skills and finally to a step-by-step educational approach. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical and referencing is not always entirely clear, such as the abrupt transition in phrases like 'Education toys are the another way'. Paragraphing is attempted, but some paragraphs contain a cluster of loosely connected ideas rather than a single unified central theme. To improve cohesion, the writer should employ a wider range of cohesive devices more naturally and ensure that sentences and paragraphs flow smoothly into one another without abrupt shifts in focus.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, successfully communicating basic concepts related to child development and education. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary, such as 'prominent', 'sensory development', and 'abstract way', but these attempts are accompanied by occasional word choice and spelling inaccuracies, such as 'congrete' instead of 'concrete', 'Aditionally', 'enhace', and 'prefereble'. These minor errors do not impede communication, but they restrict the lexical score. To achieve a higher band, the writer must demonstrate greater precision in word choice and collocation, alongside more consistent accuracy in spelling when utilizing less common lexical items.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, such as conditional or participial structures, though control over these structures is inconsistent. There are some errors in grammar and punctuation throughout the text, including article misuse ('the montessori education', 'the another way'), incorrect prepositional patterns ('rely on playing' instead of 'rely on play'), and issues with pluralisation ('6 yeas of life'). Furthermore, awkward phrasings like 'capable for turn' indicate difficulty with complex grammatical patterns. While these errors rarely impede overall communication, their frequency prevents the writing from reaching a higher level of grammatical control and accuracy.

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