Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Throughout the years, many people have argued weither primary schools should focus more on formal learning or should they also incooperate informal learning alongside it. I personally think that there should be a balanced between both informal and formal learning in primary education.

In kindergarten most of the studying is done through play so that in the future students do not fear schools as a place where there is endless studying and no fun. But, if primary schools only focus strictly on formal learning this would cause problems for the young students such as feeling overburdened or being unmotivated as their entire studies take a 360 turn from fun and interactive learning to strict textbook learning therefore, i believe primary school should mantain a balance between playful learning and textbook learning so that students are allowed to acclimate into their new learning enviroment. This can be similar to how you learn a new language, you cant merely understand or speak a language just by reading or listening to something in that language but, if you were to make more interactive you would learn it better and gradually ease into reading or listening to media in the language you were trying to learn.

Most students ages in primary schools range from 5 to 12 years, these ages are prime development ages for their brain and bodies hence, informal learning along with formal can help develope their brains and bodies alike. Informal learning can be also helpful in keeping the young minds entertained while learning which can cause their curiosity to blossom therefore, having a great impact on their intellect.

In conclusion, I believe that in primary schools formal and informal learning should be focused on equally so that the students have more oppurtunities to learn and grown. Education should never be made a chore especially for children so young but it also should not be entirely treated as a game.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the task, offering a clear position that balances formal and informal learning. The main ideas are relevant, such as the comparison to learning a language and the developmental needs of children aged 5 to 12. However, some parts of the response are slightly under-developed or rely on general assertions rather than extended, specific examples. For instance, the language-learning analogy is introduced but not fully tied back to primary school classrooms to maximize its persuasive impact. To reach a higher level, the ideas would need more thorough expansion and deeper supporting evidence throughout the body paragraphs.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear stance stated in the introduction and reinforced in the conclusion. Paragraphing is used sufficiently to separate distinct points, such as the developmental argument and the classroom balance. However, cohesion is at times mechanical or somewhat faulty; for instance, the transition 'therefore, i believe' links clauses that would be better served by clearer punctuation or distinct sentence boundaries, and referencing is occasionally loose, such as 'This can be similar to how you learn a new language'. Progression is generally logical, but smoother, more varied cohesive devices would elevate the overall flow of the essay.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common items such as 'acclimate', 'enviroment', and 'overburdened'. However, there are noticeable spelling and word choice errors throughout the text, including 'weither' instead of 'whether', 'incooperate' instead of 'incorporate', 'mantain', and 'oppurtunities'. Additionally, phrasing such as 'take a 360 turn' (which should logically be a 180-degree turn) demonstrates minor collocation issues. These errors do not seriously impede communication, reflecting a solid foundation that stops short of more precise lexical control.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures such as conditional clauses and relative clauses. There are some errors in grammar and punctuation, including run-on sentences like 'Most students ages in primary schools range from 5 to 12 years, these ages are prime development ages...', incorrect comma splices, and capitalization oversights such as the lowercase 'i'. Fortunately, these errors rarely impede overall communication. To move further up, the writer needs to increase the proportion of error-free complex sentences and exercise greater control over punctuation boundaries.

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