Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Currently, many people believe that primary schools concentrate very much on formal learning which I partly agree with this statement. The reason is I have seen both types of schools such as a school which focuses on formal learning but on the other hand some schools also focus on informal learning. Informal learning means learning from other sources except from books.

I believe that it is very important for children to play along with the formal learning like studying from books.

When children play they not only play the game but also learn from it.We can also introduce the study as a game. E, G. they learn to share, how to tackle problem,they can also learn the letters or numbers by heart very easily in comparison with studying from books if it is introduced through games. They can also discover their hobbies as well when they are playing.

The next advange of playing is they will interact with their peers, they will get to learn the trends which are happening currently. When they are playing it will stop from getting addicated to the technology such as TV or mobile phones.And then they will not be needed a treatment for eye surgery or eye doctor. When they will focus on playing automatically the exercise will also happen.

So in conclusion, I agree there are some schools that focuses on the formal learning but there are some other schools are also present which focus on informal learning. And It is also very much important for childern to play and not only 100% rely on the formal learning.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response successfully addresses all parts of the prompt by expressing a partial agreement regarding formal learning and discussing the importance of play in the primary school classroom. For instance, the writer notes that games can help children learn letters or numbers more easily and encourages social interaction. However, some ideas remain under-developed or somewhat repetitive, such as the points regarding avoiding technology and preventing health issues, which lack full extension. The overall position is generally clear throughout the essay, meeting the requirements for a balanced and relevant discussion without wandering off-topic.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a logical progression of ideas from introduction to conclusion. Paragraphing is utilised to separate distinct points, such as the benefits of learning through games and the social advantages of play. Nevertheless, cohesion is at times mechanical or faulty, as seen in repetitive transitional phrases and referencing that is not always entirely clear. For example, sentences like 'The next advange of playing is they will interact' show a reliance on basic cohesive structures rather than a smooth, flexible flow of information between sentences.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The writer demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items and communicating simple ideas clearly. However, there are noticeable spelling and word-choice errors that occasionally detract from the precision of the writing, such as 'advange' instead of advantage and 'addicated' instead of addicted. While these vocabulary and spelling slips do not severely impede communication, they reflect a limited control over more sophisticated lexical choices and collocations, restricting the overall lexical score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating an attempt at varied structures such as conditional and subordinate clauses. There are, however, frequent errors in grammar and punctuation, particularly regarding article usage, prepositions, and singular-plural agreement, such as in the phrase 'they will not be needed a treatment'. While these errors in grammar and punctuation persist throughout the text, they rarely impede the reader's overall understanding of the core message.

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