Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-06
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 7.0)
Education plays a vital role in everyone's life because it assists in the overall development of an individual. There are several people who believe that primary schools place excessive emphasis on academic learning rather than allowing children to develop through play. I partially agree with this view as formal education is crucial for academic achievement in the future, physical activities and play based learning is also equally important for children's cognitive development. This essay will elucidate my viewpoint regarding both types of education and importance of play in the subsequent paragraphs.
On the one hand, formal learning creates a foundation for the children as it helps them to learn fundamental skills of reading, writing and solving mathematic problems. In other words, these abilities provide basis for future learning and makes children more confident and independent learners. Moreover, if literacy and numeracy skills are not taught at primary level, they might struggle to understand concepts when they go to secondary school. For example, regular practice of reading and mathematics develop their communication and problem- solving skills which will assist them throughout their education.
On the other hand, play based learning helps to enhance children's physical, social and emotional development. To expound, education combined with play involves physical and group activities which can help to explore child's imagination level and ability to work in a team. Furthermore, education becomes more interesting in this way and children feel excited and motivated to come to school and study. For instance, learning from books all the time becomes boring for children at some of time whereas learning through fun activities are more engaging.
In my opinion, play should be considered just as important as academic learning in the classroom. Play not only makes learning more engaging but also helps children to develop their critical thinking and social relation with other students. Also, I believe children gain more knowledge through practical ways and helps to remember concepts quickly. Such activities make learning process more smoother and productive.
To recapitulate, formal education is vital for creating fundamental base whereas play based learning is also crucial for cognitive and social development. Primary schools should try to make a balance between both, ensuring that children's overall growth is enhanced and not hampered.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 7.0 |
| Overall | 7.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0
The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and explaining the importance of play in the primary classroom. A clear position is maintained throughout, extending into the conclusion. Ideas are generally well-extended and supported with relevant examples, such as mentioning how fundamental reading and mathematics build communication skills, and how play enhances imagination and teamwork. However, there is a slight tendency to over-generalise in parts, such as stating that 'learning from books all the time becomes boring for children at some of time', which prevents the response from reaching the highest tier. The main arguments are well-supported, and the prompt is covered thoroughly, showing a good understanding of both perspectives.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0
The essay displays a clear logical organisation and progression throughout. Each paragraph has a distinct central topic, moving smoothly from the introduction to balanced body paragraphs discussing formal and play-based learning respectively, and concluding with a balanced summary. Cohesive devices are used flexibly, with appropriate markers such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'To recapitulate' guiding the reader through the argumentation. Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately, and referencing throughout the text remains clear. While cohesion functions well, a slightly tighter integration of some sentences would elevate the structure even further, reflecting the balance required for this band.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.5
The student uses a sufficient range of vocabulary for the task with some flexibility and precision. Less common lexical items are attempted with a reasonable awareness of style and collocation, such as 'cognitive development', 'fundamental skills', and 'emotional development'. There is an adequate range for handling the topic, though occasional lexical errors and awkward phrasing appear, such as 'play based learning' (missing hyphens), 'at some of time' instead of 'at times', and 'makes learning process more smoother' instead of 'smoother'. These minor slips do not impede communication, but they sit comfortably within a solid mid-level range rather than showing the fully flexible and sophisticated control required for higher bands.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 7.0
The response demonstrates a variety of complex structures alongside frequent error-free sentences. Good control of grammar is evident in constructions like 'education plays a vital role in everyone's life because it assists in the overall development of an individual' and 'if literacy and numeracy skills are not taught at primary level, they might struggle'. Punctuation is generally well-managed, and clause combining is handled effectively. A few minor errors persist, such as subject-verb agreement or article inconsistencies in phrases like 'helps to remember concepts quickly' (missing a subject or object) and 'makes children more confident' (where a plural subject 'abilities' clashes with the singular verb form 'makes' in the second clause: 'these abilities provide basis for future learning and makes children'). Overall, control of grammar remains strong and reliable.
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