Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Majority individuals debate that secondary schools concentrates massively on formal learning.

In my opinion, I strongly agree with this notion and my opinion will be discussed in further paragraphs with a suitable conclusion. Probing ahead, one of the main underlying reason stems from the fact is that children can learn best from a play way method, earlier suggested by on eof the famous psychologist named as Mr Cook which was later globally popularized by Mr. Froebel.

It is inevitable from the above reference that young people are more inclined to learn from a play way method by practically experiencing it. Additionally, too much amount of formal learning can create a boring atmosphere where the youngersters can easily feel sleepy rather can grasping the concept of newly thought topic. For instance, I remeber was I was young and studying in the lower secondary school my teacher would motivate us to learn by doing and it was the easiest way to inculcate certain complexed topics in our tender minds. Furthermore, I can still recall all the knowledge that I learned through practice and experience. Learning and playing both at the same pace can boost the energies of the students and develop love for education at such a tender age.

On the other hand, I firmly suggest the schools should launch and upgrdae their curriculum adding such different activities for the better understanding of the pupils and at the same time the government should make sure that it is implemented all our the country. Furthermore, this idea can prevent absentees as most of the scholars would be motivated to join school and not miss a any day unnecessarily. I believe that aforementioned points are strongly supporting my view point. Notably, apart from the resons mentioned above it can be clearly stated that why many parents are in favour of this trend.

In the concluding statement it is concluded that, the great way of learning is only by pratically experiencing the difficult topics specifically and can encourage students to learn abundance amount of subjects or topics.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing whether primary schools focus too much on formal learning and explaining the importance of play alongside study. However, some ideas are more fully developed than others. For instance, the mention of historical figures like Mr. Cook and Mr. Froebel is introduced, but the explanation lacks depth and remains somewhat general rather than being fully elaborated with robust arguments. The writer's position is clear throughout, with a stance supporting play-based learning maintained from the introduction through to the conclusion. To reach a higher level, the ideas need to be extended more consistently, ensuring that every argument regarding formal versus play-based learning is thoroughly explored with concrete explanations rather than brief mentions.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement and follows a recognizable paragraph structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the progression of ideas is sometimes hindered by mechanical or faulty cohesive devices and referencing issues. Phrases like 'Probing ahead' and 'In the concluding statement it is concluded that' feel somewhat unnatural and fail to establish smooth logical transitions. Additionally, referencing is occasionally unclear, such as the sudden shift into personal anecdote ('For instance, I remember was I was young') without adequate signposting. Paragraphing is attempted, but internal cohesion within the body paragraphs can be repetitive, which prevents the essay from displaying a clear and fluid progression of thought throughout.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The writer uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully communicating everyday ideas and attempting less common items such as 'inculcate', 'tendencies', and 'curriculum'. Nevertheless, there are noticeable vocabulary and spelling inaccuracies that restrict the band. Examples of errors in word choice and spelling include 'concentrates' instead of 'concentrate' (in relation to plural nouns), 'youngersters', 'remeber', 'was I was young' (lexical/typographical slip), 'complexed', 'upgrdae', 'absentees' (used where 'absenteeism' or 'truancy' is intended), and 'abundance amount'. These errors do not completely impede communication, but they demonstrate limited precision and control over less common lexical items, keeping the score at the present level.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting relative clauses and conditional structures. However, there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation that are characteristic of the current level. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('Majority individuals debate that secondary schools concentrates'), awkward phrasing ('too much amount of formal learning'), misused prepositions and conjunctions ('where the youngersters can easily feel sleepy rather can grasping'), and awkward tense shifts ('I remeber was I was young'). While these errors rarely completely obscure the writer's meaning, they occur frequently enough across different structures to prevent the sentence forms from achieving consistent accuracy.

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