Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-06
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Formal learning is an essential part of child development. Many critics argue that primary schools should focus more on formal learning. On the other side physical richness can only be achieved by games and plays. I completely agree with this notion and will discuss by views before going to a well-suited opinion.
To begin with, formal learning plays an crucial role in classrooms where child can learn in the front of their instructors. To examplify it, the syllabus provides by the teachers is well organised in formal learning and goes through thousands of students. The fundamentals is well organised, so it suited to every kinds of childrens , therefore child can learn efficiently and more interactive way. Apart from that it enhances the learning ability of every learners as they can achieve better learning powers. Also the availablity of teachers can boost the learning confidence of each learners and give them a positive environment.
Towards shift to classroom games and plays, these activities provide better physical health and sharp mind to every children. To explain it, the games such as snakes and ladders, ludo can boost the children's interest in learning along with playful surroundings. Because of primary ages, children may not be direct comfortable with studies, giving a place which provide learning with games not only develop their interest in learning also it sharpens their mind.
In my opinion, by considering the above evidences and statements, although it is true that formal learning is an important part in primary education, the merits of plays and games in learning places shoud not be avoided for child's overall development.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
You address both parts of the question and make your position clear in the introduction (“I completely agree”) and conclusion. You also recognise that formal learning and play both contribute to children’s development, with examples such as classroom teaching and board games. However, the response does not fully explain the extent to which you agree that schools focus too much on formal learning: much of the first body paragraph praises formal instruction rather than showing whether it is overemphasised. The importance of play is stated, but its classroom benefits are only briefly explained. Develop each main point with a clearer reason and a specific example, and make the link between your position and the question more explicit.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion. Phrases such as “To begin with,” “Towards shift,” and “In my opinion” signal changes in focus, and the reader can generally follow the contrast between formal learning and play. However, progression within paragraphs is uneven: the first paragraph moves through several claims about organisation, learning ability and teacher availability without clearly connecting them. Some linking expressions are awkward or do not accurately show the relationship between ideas, and the conclusion mainly repeats the earlier points. Use a clearer topic sentence for each paragraph, then explain and support that central idea in sequence; use linking words only where they express the intended connection.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You attempt vocabulary relevant to education and child development, including “formal learning,” “physical health,” “learning ability,” and “positive environment.” There is also some effort to use less common expressions, such as “overall development.” However, word choice and collocation are often inaccurate or unnatural, which sometimes makes the meaning difficult to follow: “physical richness,” “well-suited opinion,” and “Towards shift to classroom games and plays” are examples. There are also noticeable spelling and word-form errors, including “examplify,” “availablity,” and “shoud.” Build a more reliable range of natural phrases for discussing education, and check spelling and whether nouns, verbs and adjectives fit the sentence.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You try to use both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a concession in “although it is true that formal learning is an important part…” and a reason introduced by “Because.” However, complex sentences are often not controlled successfully, and errors in articles, agreement, plurals and sentence construction occur throughout. Examples include “plays an crucial role,” “where child can learn,” “The fundamentals is,” and “every kinds of childrens.” The sentence beginning “Because of primary ages” is also difficult to interpret because its grammatical structure is incomplete or unclear. Practise accurate basic sentence patterns first, especially subject–verb agreement and singular/plural forms, then build longer sentences and check that each clause has a clear subject and verb.
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