Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-07
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In recent years, there has been considerable debate about whether formal teaching should be the only focus in primary schools or not. Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning, while others hold a different view. In my opinion, I completely agree with the idea that children should have the opporunity to study as well as play during their primary school period.
In the one hand, formal learning and education helps in shaping the mind of a child. It allows children to open up their mind, learn new ideas and understand themselves. Formal education at primary school is the base of what the student will become in future. It shows a wide range of opportunities as well as helps children to break from economic unstability in future. So, academic courses are much important for the overall well-being of children.
On the other hand, educational institutes should also focus on fun activities for children. These activities help in enhancing creativity and allow children to solve problems that they may face later in their life. Playing is as important as formal education because it teaches how to work in a team and communicate effectively. These activites encourage children to share their ideas openly and solving complex puzles helps in sharpening the mind. For example, the children who play remain physically and mentally active other than those who don't play.
In conclusion, I firmly believe that schools should provide an environment for children to play and get formal education as well in their ealy stages of life. B
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
Your position is clear: you agree that children should both study and play, and you address the importance of each. The points about formal education building a foundation and play developing teamwork, communication and problem-solving are relevant. However, these ideas are not equally developed: the claim that education can help children escape economic instability is asserted without explanation, and the example about active children is broad rather than specific. The response also falls three words short of the required 250-word minimum; the 12 words copied from the prompt are excluded from the count. To strengthen the response, explain your main claims with a concrete classroom example and develop how play should complement, rather than replace, formal learning.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction states your view, two body paragraphs contrast formal learning with play, and a conclusion restates your position. Signposting such as “On the other hand” helps readers follow the shift between the two main ideas. However, some links are mechanical, and the first body paragraph begins “In the one hand,” which does not form a clear or accurate transition. Within paragraphs, ideas sometimes move quickly—for example, the discussion shifts from education shaping the mind to economic stability without showing the connection. The final “B” is also an unexplained fragment. Use transitions more naturally and add linking explanations between claims so the progression feels less like a list.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use an adequate range of vocabulary for the topic, including “formal education,” “creativity,” “communicate effectively” and “overall well-being.” Some attempts at more specific language help express relevant ideas, such as “economic unstability” and “sharpening the mind,” but inaccurate word forms, spelling and collocations reduce precision. Examples include “opporunity,” “activites,” “puzles” and “ealy,” as well as the unnatural phrase “break from economic unstability.” “Academic courses are much important” is also an awkward choice of wording. These errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your main points, but careful proofreading and more natural collocations would make the vocabulary more controlled and precise.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including clauses beginning “whether” and “because,” and most of the message remains clear. Some grammatical errors are present, however. For example, “formal learning and education helps” has a subject–verb agreement problem, while “In the one hand” uses an incorrect prepositional pattern. In “These activities encourage children to share their ideas openly and solving complex puzzles,” the two coordinated actions are not grammatically parallel. The sentence “Playing is as important as formal education because it teaches how to work in a team” also leaves the subject of “work” unclear. Review agreement, parallel structures and sentence patterns, and proofread the final line, where the isolated “B” disrupts the punctuation and completion.
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