Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

As discussed about the primary schools formal learning , let me tell you a story, When I was in the primary school , my primary school also focus just on the formal learning, Then one day an officer came to my school and wanted to know about the students way of understanding, that officer asked questions; students did not understand at once they tried hard to understand. Then a teacher rised up and told , "Dear sir, these students did'nt understand your question once, The officer said why? The teacher said, Sir, they are coming here just for learning, there are no cocurricular activities performed here, just becuase of there memories are not too much sharp to undertand the questions once. Co-curricular activities help students to refresh thier minds which help them to memorizw and understand things quickly". So , that day , I understood that focus only on formal learning is not a good approach, must focus on the co-corricular activities, In primary schools , there must be playgrounds for different games like cricket, football, hockey and badminton. These schools must perform some competitions between the students regarding games like chess, cricket, football, snooker and quiz competitions.Through those activities , students not just able to refresh their minds only thay are also able how to perform team work , how to collaborate with other candidates in the team. It will encourage students to be motivated for their goals that how to reach their destination with the help of whole team

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You take a clear position that primary schools should not focus only on formal learning, and your personal story about the officer and teacher gives a relevant reason: activities can refresh pupils and support understanding. You also explain benefits such as teamwork and motivation, and suggest games and competitions. However, the response addresses the two questions unevenly. It does not clearly explain how important play is alongside classroom learning, or distinguish play from organised co-curricular activities; much of the answer lists activities rather than developing how they complement lessons. The example is also difficult to follow, so its support for your position is not always clear. Develop the classroom-learning comparison and explain one or two benefits in more detail.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a recognisable line of thought: a personal anecdote leads to your view, followed by examples of activities and their benefits. However, it is presented as one long paragraph, with no clear separation between the story, your argument and your conclusion. Linking words such as “Then,” “So,” and “Through those activities” help show sequence, but the narrative becomes difficult to follow because several events and explanations are joined together. For example, the officer’s questions, the teacher’s explanation and your conclusion run on without clear sentence boundaries. Use separate paragraphs for your position, supporting reasons and conclusion, and make each sentence express one main step in the argument.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “co-curricular activities,” “team work,” “collaborate” and “competitions.” These terms help communicate your main ideas, but the range is limited and several expressions are repeated or imprecise, such as “formal learning” and “refresh their minds.” There are also noticeable spelling and word-choice errors, including “becuase,” “memorizw,” “thier” and “undertand,” which can distract the reader. Some phrases are not natural in this context, for example “students way of understanding” and “reach their destination.” Build a more precise range for discussing learning outcomes and use standard spellings and natural collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt longer sentences and reported speech, but control is inconsistent, and errors sometimes make the account hard to follow. For example, “my primary school also focus” has incorrect subject–verb agreement, while “these students did'nt understand your question once” has problems with verb form and sentence meaning. Several sentences join independent ideas with commas or no punctuation, particularly the long passage beginning “Then one day an officer came to my school.” There is also limited variety in sentence structures, with many ideas linked through “and” or “that.” Practise accurate past-tense narration, agreement and sentence boundaries, then use a mix of shorter sentences and controlled complex clauses.

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