Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In today's world there have been different investigation and research in the field of education and the methods of teaching. Some people argued that primary schools focus too much on formal learning. I firmly agree with the staement, in my opinion the children should learn about the life related things in primary level rather than reading books.

In most of school they are making student a robot for their school reputaion they have started to give load of assinments to primary level pupils to get a good marks. They have started extra tution classes to make children engage with study and make a master bussiness module by adding varities of things in the name of study. This kind of habit hamper kids in their creativity. The child mind will be dull because he will not get enough time for playing and be social. For example, my sister is in class 3 I have seen her taking heavy books with her while going to study but she lacks many skill she don't know how to talk when relatives came in house.

On the one hand, I have become glad she is excellent in her study but the study is not theoritcal it should be practical too. In my opinion, the children in the primary level should teach by different kind of playing and learning strategies. Furthermore, these kind of learning methods helps pupils to learn quickly and it will be more fruitfull gor them. By this kind of practise they can make friends and will have confidience to talking others and problem solving skill can be developed.

In conclusion, the school must not focused their primary level students lots of homework and session on the curriculum instead of this they should give more time to play and socilize and teach students by using play and learn methods.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear: you agree that primary schools place too much emphasis on formal study, and you address both the value of play and learning. The examples about your sister’s heavy books and limited social confidence make the argument relevant, while your suggestions about learning through play respond directly to the second question. This meets the task well overall. However, some points are less fully developed: the claim that schools make pupils “a robot” is broad, and the example about your sister could explain more clearly how classroom play would address the difficulty you describe. To strengthen the response further, develop each main reason with a clearer explanation or specific example. The response meets the required length; nine words copied from the task prompt were excluded from the count.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, supporting paragraphs and a conclusion, and the main position can be followed. The paragraphs generally group related ideas: the second discusses pressure from formal study, while the third presents play-based learning as a solution. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow, particularly in the list of assignments, tuition classes and a “master business module.” Some linking phrases, such as “On the one hand,” do not clearly signal the relationship between the ideas that follow. References such as “these kind of learning methods” are also not always precise. Use clearer topic sentences and connect each example explicitly to the point it supports; vary transitions according to the actual relationship between ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “formal learning,” “creativity,” “practical,” “problem solving” and “socialize.” These choices help communicate your main ideas, and you attempt to express concepts beyond basic classroom vocabulary. However, the range is limited by repeated general words such as “study,” “children” and “play,” while several inaccurate or misspelled expressions make meaning less clear. Examples include “load of assignments,” “master business module,” “fruitfull gor them” and “confidience to talking others.” Aim for more precise collocations and check spelling and word forms carefully. Using terms such as “academic workload,” “social skills” and “play-based learning” would make the argument clearer and more natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including explanations with “because” and “while,” and the overall meaning is usually recoverable. However, complex sentences are often not controlled accurately, and errors in verb forms, agreement, articles and sentence construction occur throughout. For example, “they have started to give load of assignments” needs an article and a more accurate noun phrase, while “the child mind will be dull” has an unclear grammatical structure. In “she don't know how to talk,” the subject and verb do not agree; “children in the primary level should teach” also needs a passive form. Practise building accurate sentences first, then extend them with subordinate clauses. Check subject–verb agreement and whether each sentence needs an active or passive verb.

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