Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.0)

This easy will investigate the subject of some people argue that primary schools focus much on fromal learning. How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom. Outlining key arguments, reflecting on possible consequences, and offering a justified conclusion. To being with, an important point is that primary school focus too much on formal learning. This is because IT=t has both long-term and short-term effects on individuals and communities. In the short term, It influences the ways people behave and make decision to other daily lives. While in the long term, It can shape future generation and the derication of society. For example, in today`s world. Many people can see this situation in otheir everyday routines. As an effects Education, work and personal life in ways. It may even change people can set their goals and other around them. In addition, another important point this issue is that children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom how to important,This is lagely because It has an essential role in shaping the future of both on people and society. It is not only influences how people lives today also determines the kind of opportunity that well be available them in the future. For instance It can be observed many countries that this issue is has an impact people education, employment chance, lifestyle and overall well-being. Yes in agree this opinion this is important in future on every people.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response3.5
Coherence and Cohesion3.5
Lexical Resource4.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy4.5
Overall4.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

The response makes a limited attempt to address the topic, but it does not clearly explain how much you agree or give a developed answer about the importance of play alongside learning. The opening repeats the question, while the conclusion, “Yes in agree this opinion,” gives only a brief and unclear position. Most supporting points—such as effects on “future generation” and society—are general and are not connected specifically to children’s classroom learning or supported with relevant examples. The response also does not meet the required minimum: it contains 219 words, which is 31 words short, and 32 words copied from the prompt were not counted. To improve, state your view directly, explain how play supports children’s learning, and develop each reason with a specific example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5

There is a basic attempt to organise the response, including an introduction, two main points signalled by “To being with” and “In addition,” and a concluding sentence. However, the ideas do not progress clearly: the discussion moves from formal learning to broad effects on society, then to play, without explaining the links between them. Several sentences are incomplete or difficult to follow, such as “For example, in today`s world. Many people can see this situation…” and “As an effects Education, work and personal life in ways.” The repeated use of “It” also leaves the reference unclear. Use separate paragraphs for your position, reasons, and conclusion, and connect each sentence to the specific point about primary-school learning.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You attempt some topic-related vocabulary, including “formal learning,” “long-term and short-term effects,” “future generation,” and “overall well-being.” This shows some range beyond very basic words. However, many expressions are inaccurate or too general for the task, which makes your meaning difficult to identify: “focus much on fromal learning,” “the derication of society,” and “employment chance” are examples. Spelling and word-form errors such as “derication,” “lagely,” and “otheir” also reduce precision. Aim to use vocabulary that directly describes classroom learning and children’s development, and check collocations and spelling. For example, explain whether play develops social skills, creativity, or understanding rather than referring vaguely to effects on society.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts both simple and more complex forms, including “This is because…” and “It is not only… also…,” but control is inconsistent. Errors in sentence structure and verb forms appear in examples such as “primary school focus,” “children to play as well as learn… how to important,” and “It is not only influences how people lives.” Some sentences are fragments, including “For example, in today`s world.” Punctuation and capitalisation are also unreliable, as in “important,This” and the inconsistent use of “It.” These problems sometimes make the intended meaning hard to follow. Practise writing complete subject–verb sentences, then check agreement and verb forms; for instance, use “primary schools focus” and “children’s lives.”

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