Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Early education of children is very important in developing their command in education. Some people argue that primary school nowadays focus too much on formal learning. I partially agree with the opinion because nowadays many primary school have started teaching some advance courses and practical skill as well.

On the one hand, people argue that most of the primary school mainly focus on teaching students how to pronounce, speak and memories words.This approach will affect the learning progress of the children. For example, the 5th grade student is learning the same thing just like a 2nd grade student.

On the other hand, many primary schools started teaching basic computer and other usefull practical skills to children. These skill eventually increase students interest in education. As well as it help them to develop and polish their skills in future.

Moreover, many primary schools organise different extra curriculumn activities such as sports week etc. These activity eventually make them mentally relaxed and physically active.

My believe is playing at primary level is important as learning. As " a physically healthy person have a healthy brain". So playing will help children to remain fresh during the whole day.For example, many primary schools allow their students to play in the first hour of the day.

In conclusion, formal learning is important at primary level but teaching some advance courses and practical skill along with playing help children to learn effectively. Thats why i believe a mix approach will haave better results.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both questions and give a recognisable position: you partially agree that formal learning receives too much attention, and you state that play is as important as learning. Relevant points include practical skills, extracurricular activities, and the value of physical activity. However, the discussion is only partly developed. The example that a fifth-grade pupil studies the same material as a second-grade pupil is not explained, and the point about practical courses does not clearly show whether schools focus too much on formal learning. Your reasons for the importance of play are also brief. The response is three words below the required minimum, which contributes to the limited development. Explain each main reason more fully and connect it directly to the question.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall arrangement, with an introduction, contrasting body paragraphs, a paragraph on play, and a conclusion. Signposts such as “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the main stages. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes mechanical or unclear. For example, “As well as it help them to develop and polish their skills in future” does not connect smoothly to the preceding point, and the relationship between formal learning and practical skills could be made more explicit. Some references, such as “These activity,” are unclear because the noun is plural. Use linking phrases selectively, make each paragraph develop one central idea, and ensure pronouns clearly refer to the intended subject.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “formal learning,” “practical skills,” “extra curriculum activities,” and “physically active,” so the reader can understand the subject and your main points. However, the range is limited and several word-choice, collocation, word-form, and spelling errors are noticeable. Examples include “command in education,” “memories words,” “usefull,” and “advance courses”; these choices sometimes make the intended meaning less natural or precise. Repetition of “important,” “children,” and “help” also limits variety. Build a more accurate range of education-related expressions and check spelling and word forms. Prefer precise phrases such as “develop foundational skills” or “hands-on learning” where they fit your meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a reason clause with “because” and a contrast introduced by “On the other hand.” The main message is generally understandable, but frequent errors in sentence structure, agreement, articles, and punctuation make the writing less controlled. For example, “primary school nowadays focus” has a subject–verb agreement problem, while “These skill eventually increase” has a plural agreement error. In “As ‘a physically healthy person have a healthy brain’,” the subject and verb do not agree, and the quotation is not integrated smoothly into the sentence. There are also run-on or poorly punctuated sentences, such as “during the whole day.For example.” Practise accurate sentence patterns and proofread for agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries.

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