Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

There are many people argue that junior schools concentrate too much on academic learning,whereas other think that play as well as equally crucial.However, i partially agree with the given notion because both have there benefits formal learning can enhance children education skills on the other hand play also make children more creative and active.

To commance with, the rimary reason is that why i partially agree.Firstly we see formal learning . There are various type of positive effects such as through this children learn how to improve there acadmeic skills and how they can apply on other field.For instance, if children to get much iunformation about formal learning they can easily understand any education related cioncept and problems.However, there are also some drabacks only focus on formal learning thye children not improving properly, lack of practical skills ,less social interaction.

Furthermore, play is also more crucial part of learning at primary level. because it helps children develop social skills, creativity, problem solving,interaction.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You give a relevant, partly balanced position: “I partially agree,” and identify benefits of formal learning alongside play, including academic skills, creativity and social development. However, the response addresses the task only partially. The reasons are listed rather than explained, and the example about understanding educational concepts is general rather than specific. The second question—how important play is in the classroom—is only briefly touched on, with no explanation of how play complements lessons or an example of classroom activity. The response is also below the required 250 words, which leaves the argument substantially under-developed. To strengthen it, state your position clearly, develop each main reason with explanation and a relevant example, and give a direct conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is some basic organisation: the opening introduces your position, the next paragraph discusses formal learning, and the final paragraph turns to play. Linking expressions such as “Firstly,” “For instance,” and “Furthermore” help signal the direction of ideas. However, progression is limited because points are mostly presented as short lists, and the response ends without a conclusion. Some connections are unclear, particularly “the primary reason is that why I partially agree,” while “However” does not clearly show the relationship between the example and the drawbacks that follow. Paragraphing is present but the final paragraph is too brief to develop its topic. Use one clear controlling idea per paragraph, connect each explanation to the question, and add a concluding paragraph that restates your view.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “formal learning,” “academic skills,” “practical skills,” “social interaction,” and “problem solving.” These choices show that you can communicate the main subject and identify different areas of child development. However, the range is limited and several word-choice, collocation and spelling errors make parts difficult to understand, such as “drabacks,” “commance,” and “get much information about formal learning.” Some phrases are also imprecise, including “more crucial part of learning” and “apply on other field.” Aim to use accurate, natural combinations and check spelling carefully. More precise terms such as “structured instruction,” “hands-on skills,” and “cooperate with classmates” would help you explain your ideas with greater clarity.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a contrast introduced by “whereas” and a conditional structure beginning “if children…”. This shows some effort to vary sentence forms. However, the range remains limited, and errors are frequent enough to make several sentences difficult to follow. For example, “There are many people argue” lacks a correct clause structure, while “play also make children” has subject–verb disagreement. The opening also runs several ideas together without appropriate sentence boundaries, and “because” begins a fragment in the final paragraph. Practise forming complete clauses, checking subject–verb agreement and using punctuation to separate ideas. Short, accurate sentences would make your argument clearer before you attempt longer structures.

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