Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 7.0)

These days, every time you go to a primary school, you learn about structured learning. But which is the better method of learning: formal or informal? Some people believe that teaching rote learning is good for students in primary schools. I completely disagree with this idea, and in this essay I will support my opinion with examples.

Firstly, young children learn best through exploration and play. When lessons are mostly teacher-led or exam-oriented, pupils often lose curiosity and feel more stress. For example, in Finland, students begin formal learning at the age of seven, yet the country is known for its strong educational results. This suggests that early academic learning is not necessary for success.

Secondly, too much classroom learning limits physical and social development. Children who sit at desks for long hours have fewer opportunities to exercise, work in teams and make friends, which can lead to health problems and weak communication skills.

On the other hand, some people believe that academic learning is essential at this stage. Reading, writing and numeracy are the foundation of all later study, and pupils who fall behind in primary school may struggle to catch up in secondary school. However, this does not mean that lessons must be strict and exam-based. Basic skills can be taught through games, stories and group projects, which keep pupils motivated.

In conclusion, some people believe that primary schools focus too much on formal learning. Although core academic skills are important, I believe that primary schools should reduce their focus on formal learning and pay more attention to students' play, creativity and sports skills.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

Your position is clear throughout: you disagree that primary schools should prioritise formal learning, while acknowledging that reading, writing and numeracy matter. You address both the focus on formal learning and the importance of play, supporting your view with reasons about curiosity, stress, physical health and social development. The Finland example also helps illustrate your point. These ideas are relevant and generally extended, but some claims remain broad: for instance, the link between sitting at desks and “health problems” is asserted rather than explained or illustrated. The response would be more fully developed with a specific classroom example showing how play supports learning, and a clearer explanation of how much formal learning is excessive. The conclusion restates your position effectively, though “sports skills” is narrower than the wider case for play and creativity.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay has a clear overall structure, moving from your position to two supporting reasons, then considering the opposing view before concluding. Paragraphs each have a recognisable purpose, and signposts such as “Firstly,” “Secondly,” and “On the other hand” make the progression easy to follow. This gives the response a coherent framework, though the linking can feel somewhat formulaic and the connections between claims are not always fully developed. For example, the Finland example follows the point about exploration and play, but the relationship between delayed formal learning and play-based learning could be made more explicit. The opening questions also introduce a formal-versus-informal contrast that is not consistently used later. To strengthen cohesion, use more precise references between ideas and explain how each example supports the paragraph’s main claim.

Lexical Resource: Band 7.0

You use a sufficient range of topic vocabulary with some flexibility, including “teacher-led,” “exam-oriented,” “physical and social development,” “numeracy,” and “group projects.” These choices communicate the main arguments clearly and show awareness of appropriate educational terminology. There are occasional imprecise or awkward expressions, however. “Structured learning” is not quite the same as formal learning in the opening, and “teaching rote learning” is an unnatural way to describe the opposing view. “Sports skills” is also less suitable than a broader phrase about physical activity or development. Some wording, such as “strong educational results,” is understandable but general. More precise collocations and a wider range of terms for play-based learning would make the argument sound more fluent and controlled.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, and several sentences are controlled well, such as “Although core academic skills are important, I believe that primary schools should reduce their focus on formal learning.” The conditional construction “Children who sit at desks for long hours have fewer opportunities…” is also clear. Some sentence patterns are less natural or precise, particularly the opening question, “But which is the better method of learning: formal or informal?” and “Some people believe that teaching rote learning is good,” where the grammatical framing is awkward. The essay remains easy to understand, but the range of structures is not consistently handled with the control needed for a stronger performance. Practise varying clause structures while checking that each sentence expresses the intended relationship between ideas; careful editing of openings and complex sentences would help.

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