Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning. Formal learning is give student formal way study without any distraction and student can focus in thier study. In my opinion i partily agree with this view.

On the one hand, student focus too much on formal learning without any activity. Formal learning is an important for students goals and results, moreover, students focus on thier study they can give their full potentile time on study. Students learn in dicipline and manner. Some students in school are distracted by sports and other kind of activity likewise, music, drama and art. that type of activities consume a lot of time, hence, they cannot give their important time on their homework and classes. For instance, In Nepal formal schools, students dicipline learn in school, they focus on their study without any take any intrest in other activity and they achieve their study goals and make a bright future.

On the other hand, other people believe that play as well as learn in primary school classrom is an important. Students who are study with play are very active than formal learners. Play creates student numoruos things and develop their mind quick solving skill. In addition, students who study with play are very active and to more creative. students can make their career in other field they know their self in which field they are best. However, students who stduy in formal learning are less energatic. for example; Some times student bore by their study so school add lectures like art ,drama , PT class that give them refreshment.

In conclusion, formal learning is give student better result and marks in thier study However some time students feel bore and anxious hence school should provide creative classes that can help them and feel relax. Moreover that boost their problem solving skills with play.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both questions and give a position: “I partly agree,” while the conclusion recognises that formal study has value but children also need creative classes and play. The response includes relevant reasons, such as play supporting activity and problem-solving, and an example involving art, drama and PE. However, the two sides are not developed equally clearly. The claim that activities distract pupils and take time away from homework is asserted rather than explained, and the Nepal example is difficult to follow and does not clearly show how formal learning leads to the stated outcomes. Explain more precisely how a balance of structured lessons and play benefits primary-aged children. The 12 words copied from the task prompt were not counted.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, two contrasting body paragraphs signalled by “On the one hand” and “On the other hand,” and a conclusion. This helps the reader follow the main contrast. You also use linking expressions such as “moreover,” “for instance” and “however.” At times, though, connections feel mechanical or do not clearly express the relationship between ideas; for example, “moreover” introduces a point that largely repeats the previous claim about focusing on study. Some references are unclear, including “that type of activities” and “they” in the Nepal example. Build each paragraph around one clear point, connect the example directly to it, and use pronouns only when their reference is unmistakable.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use vocabulary relevant to education and children, including “formal learning,” “discipline,” “creative,” “problem-solving skills” and “refreshment.” There are also attempts to express less basic ideas, such as play helping pupils discover which field suits them. However, the range and control are limited by repeated wording and noticeable spelling, word-form and collocation errors. Examples include “potentile,” “dicipline,” “numoruos,” “energetic” misspelled as “energatic,” and the unnatural phrase “make a bright future.” These errors sometimes make the intended meaning harder to understand. Learn common education-related word partnerships and check spelling carefully; for instance, use “develop problem-solving skills” rather than “develop their mind quick solving skill.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentences, using structures such as “Students who study with play…” and clauses introduced by “so” and “hence.” This shows some range, and the overall meaning is generally recoverable. However, errors in verb forms, agreement, articles and sentence construction occur across the response. For example, “Formal learning is give student” needs a correctly formed verb and object, while “students who are study” has an incorrect verb pattern. In “students focus on their study they can give,” two clauses are joined without suitable punctuation or a connector. Practise accurate basic sentence patterns first, then build complex sentences with clear clause boundaries. Also check capitalisation and punctuation, especially at sentence starts and around examples.

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