Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Few individuals often argue that primary level academic institutes emphasize formal learning too much. I partially agree with this view because schools are nowadays very strict and their teaching method only focuses on marks and grades of children rather than actual development of children personality not only but also in this way children becomes less interested in school due to strictness, but at the same time it make them incompetitive and sometimes teacher lose their respect.

On one hand, primary group childrens are not mostly mature they are in their learning phase and exploring their subjects and fields so in this time period teacher should engage with students in a friendly manner and have some little bit before teaching them so they can interact & engage and then teach them in a polite way which will enhance overall children personality and eventually student will make a bond with their teachers and try to score well by their own because of the teacher soft teaching method. Moreover, it will also improve attendance of children because like to go to school because of their favourite teacher

On the other hand, giving too much space or leniency or exchanging too much jokes in classrooms with students make them incompetitve regarding academic performance becuase of the unecessary conversations. It goes without saying that, impact of too much softness and politeness results in sometimes teacher disrespect as students become more comfortable with teachers then they dont respect them like teacher and do conversation frankly as they do with their friends.

To conclude, agree strict teaching method impacts indirectly on students academic record or overall character developement while too much leniency can also cause make childrens less competitive and undisciplined. I believe teacher should teach students in a polite & friendly manner but in a limit so there academic performance and overall development take growth.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You give a clear, qualified position by saying you “partially agree” and concluding that teachers should be friendly “but in a limit.” You also address both formal learning and the value of a supportive classroom, with relevant points about engagement, attendance, academic performance and discipline. However, the two parts of the question are not fully developed: the importance of play is mostly implied through friendliness and jokes, rather than explained with examples of how play supports learning or children’s development. Some claims, such as strictness making pupils “incompetitive,” are unclear or insufficiently supported. Explain what you mean by formal learning, distinguish it from play-based learning, and develop each main reason with a specific example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, two contrasting body paragraphs signposted by “On one hand” and “On the other hand,” and a conclusion. This helps the reader follow your broad argument. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to track because several ideas are packed into long sentences, and some links are unclear—for example, the opening paragraph moves from strict teaching to children’s interest, competitiveness and teachers’ respect without clearly showing how these points connect. The second body paragraph also shifts from leniency to academic performance and then respect. Use shorter, more focused sentences, make each paragraph develop one central point, and use clear references to connect examples to your argument.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some vocabulary relevant to education, including “formal learning,” “academic performance,” “attendance,” and “overall development.” These choices show that you can discuss the topic, but the range and control are limited, and several word choices or collocations make the meaning unclear. For instance, “primary group childrens,” “make them incompetitive,” and “exchanging too much jokes” are not natural expressions in this context. Spelling errors such as “becuase,” “unecessary,” and “developement” also reduce accuracy. Build a more precise set of phrases for classroom learning and child development, and check spelling and collocations when editing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including a contrastive structure in “while too much leniency can also cause…” and a reason clause beginning “because.” However, complex sentences are often difficult to follow because of faulty clause construction, agreement and missing grammatical elements. For example, “children becomes less interested” has a subject–verb agreement error, while “it make them” and “teacher lose” also need agreement. The opening sentence runs several ideas together, and “because like to go to school” lacks a clear subject. Use shorter sentences to control clauses, check singular and plural subjects, and review articles, verb forms and punctuation.

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