Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.0)

Some citizens argue that schools focus too much on formal learning . I will explain that why i support this viewpoint, Primary schools learning to build basic knowledge and primary schools learning to improve and help mediam, higher educations.

I completly believe that, primary schools education is mainly to build basic knowledge . other people beleive that, primary education is most important to develop educational renges, if any person can to learnt primary education who always complet her basic work.

Many people claim that, primary education to improved and help mediam and higher education . I think that primary schools is most important to all educations if any person knows primary educations he will know everything easily , for example most of time we need basic things now if we to know primary educations we will complet our all things.

To sume up, primary schools learning is very important for every people , primary schools is promote and improved mediam and hidger education , primary school focus too much on formal learning.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

You state a position in the opening—“I support this viewpoint”—and return to the importance of primary education in the conclusion. However, the response only minimally addresses the question. It does not explain clearly why formal learning is excessive, and it gives almost no answer to the separate question of how important play is alongside learning. The examples about “basic things” and completing “all things” are too vague to support your claims. The response is also 78 words below the required minimum, which leaves little space to develop relevant reasons and examples. To improve, address both questions directly, explain your reasons, and include a specific classroom example, such as how play can help children practise cooperation or problem-solving.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

Your response has an opening, several body paragraphs and a concluding paragraph, so there is an attempt to organise the answer. The repeated focus on primary education gives it a basic sense of unity. However, the ideas do not progress clearly: the second and third paragraphs repeat that primary education builds knowledge and supports later education without developing distinct points. Linking words such as “for example” and “To sume up” are present, but the example does not clearly illustrate the preceding claim, and the conclusion introduces no clear summary of an argument about play. Plan one paragraph for your view on formal learning and another for the role of play, then connect each claim to an explanation and example.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some vocabulary relevant to education, including “formal learning,” “basic knowledge,” and “higher education,” and the reader can generally identify the topic. However, the range is limited and several phrases are unclear or inaccurately chosen, such as “improve and help mediam,” “educational renges,” and “primary schools learning.” Spelling errors, including “completly,” “beleive,” and “hidger,” also reduce accuracy. These problems sometimes make it difficult to understand the intended point, particularly where you discuss the role of primary education. Build a small set of accurate topic phrases and use them in clear sentences—for example, “develop foundational skills,” “support later learning,” and “learning through play.” Check spelling and word forms during revision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences, for example, “I completly believe that, primary schools education is mainly to build basic knowledge” and “if any person knows primary educations he will know everything easily.” However, sentence structures are often faulty, and errors in articles, agreement, verb forms and punctuation make several claims hard to follow. Examples include “primary schools is most important,” “if any person can to learnt,” and the comma after “that” in “I believe that, primary schools education…”. Most sentences would benefit from a clear subject and verb, with one main idea expressed at a time. Practise accurate simple sentences first, then join related ideas using “because,” “while” or “for example,” checking agreement and verb forms.

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