Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It has been observed that primary education plays an important role in kids lives. Some individuals think that primary school focus too much on formal learning while others say that it should be playway method. I find the given notion logicall sound and my veiws regarding the statement greater extent. I will partly agree with this statement and I will highlight these point in the subsequent paragraph, which will be lead to logical conclusion.

To commence with, formal education is very important part for young children. Primary schools are the first stage of education where they learn basic subjects such as English, Maths, and science. For instance, A survey conducted by the global education organisation in 2023 revealed that 90% children brain learn in their early age.

On the other hand, kids have a extra burden and anxiety if they learn by force. To elaborate it, some time teacher do pressor on primary students to learn all subjects, however, kids getting bore and they do not want to learn those topics. So they do not want to go school because the method teaching is not effective. For example, a headline published by world news in 2025 showed that while playway method kids learn more effectively.

To conclude the discussion, it can be said despide the fact that formal education is crucial part of primary but if teacher should make it effective children would learn fast and enjoy shool timing. Athoirty should design study with playway method for primary student so that they will not get bore.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both parts of the question and present a partly agreeing position: formal education is important, but children can become anxious or disengaged when learning is forced. The examples of basic school subjects and the possible benefits of play-based learning are relevant. However, the position is not fully clear in the introduction: “I find the given notion logical” seems to signal agreement, while “I will partly agree” is less specific about what you agree with. The supporting ideas are also under-developed; for example, the survey and news headline are mentioned but not explained or connected convincingly to your argument. State your view precisely and develop each main point with a clear explanation or a concrete example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs presenting contrasting points, and a conclusion. Transitions such as “On the other hand” help signal the shift from the value of formal education to the drawbacks of pressure. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow, and several linking phrases feel mechanical, including “To commence with” and “To conclude the discussion.” The introduction promises points that will lead to a conclusion but does not clearly map the argument. Some references are also unclear, such as “this statement” and “these point.” To improve, organise each body paragraph around one main claim, then explain and illustrate it in a clear sequence, using simpler, more precise links.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “formal education,” “anxiety,” “basic subjects,” and “playway method,” so the main ideas are generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or repetitive, which can make the reader pause. Examples include “kids lives,” “extra burden,” “learn by force,” and “make it effective children would learn fast.” Spelling errors such as “veiw,” “despide,” and “shool” also reduce accuracy. Aim for more precise academic phrasing and check spelling carefully. For instance, describe children as “under pressure” rather than having “an extra burden,” and use “play-based learning” consistently instead of switching between informal or unclear expressions.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a contrast introduced by “while” and a conditional idea in the conclusion. However, complex structures are often faulty, and errors in agreement, articles, verb forms, and sentence construction occur frequently enough to affect clarity. For example, “primary school focus” needs subject–verb agreement, while “90% children brain learn” has several grammatical problems that obscure the intended meaning. In “if teacher should make it effective children would learn fast,” the conditional structure is not formed correctly. Practise building accurate sentences with one main clause and a clearly controlled subordinate clause, and check articles, plural forms, and verb agreement before adding more complexity.

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