Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is often to argued that primary school will read formal education on students such as the writing, reading, and exams. I completely agree with this opinion, and I believe that people extremely important in classrooms.

Noeadays, the children will teach the student within 4 to 5 hours and to sit in the classroom in primary schools and act as secondary school.; This is not things that student sit in 4 to 5 hours at this ages. Young people can lost the attention and focus on your study and this is not suitable at this aged. They do not go outside and not to explore the the outside images that's why they also lost the creativity. Too much formal learning make feel stress because the mind have not freshed.

In my opinion, play is not a waste time. The children play games and mind has been freshed and they think creativity. For example, playing with building blocks teaches them math and physics. They improve the communication and siting skills with the help of types of games. This is the best thinks that teachers can trained the students in differents skills like that the sitting planes and communication skills.

In conclusion, although basic literacy and numerancy are necessary, primary schools and secondary schools should not focus on your learning. A balance that should learning and playing is the bet things approach because it helps children develop academically, society, and emotionally, Others, the students can earning diificult thinks they cannit understand they understtod with the help of games types learning.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you agree that formal learning can be overemphasised, and you address both the effects of classroom routines and the value of play. The example of building blocks teaching “math and physics” is relevant, while your conclusion recognises the need to balance literacy and numeracy with play. However, some points are not fully explained. For instance, you say children lose creativity when they do not explore outdoors, but do not show how classroom play could address this. The second part of the question—how important play is in the classroom—could be answered more directly and supported with a clearer example. Develop each main idea with an explanation of its effect on children and keep your position consistent in the conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs about formal learning and play, and a conclusion. This helps the reader follow the broad argument, and phrases such as “For example” and “In conclusion” signal the direction of the discussion. However, connections between some ideas are unclear, particularly in the first body paragraph, where classroom hours, attention, outdoor exploration and stress are placed together without a clear sequence. The final sentence also introduces a new point about learning difficult concepts rather than bringing the argument to a clear close. Use topic sentences, then explain and illustrate one main idea at a time. Clearer references and more precise links between sentences would make the progression easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “formal learning,” “creativity,” “communication skills,” and “academically.” These choices show awareness of the subject and help convey your main ideas. However, the range is often basic or inaccurately used, and several phrases make the intended meaning difficult to understand. For example, “people extremely important in classrooms” does not clearly express the importance of play, while “the outside images” and “sitting planes” are not suitable expressions in context. Spelling and word-form errors such as “Noeadays,” “numerancy,” and “diificult” also reduce clarity. Build a bank of accurate topic collocations, such as “hands-on activities” and “develop social skills,” and check spelling and word forms carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You make some attempts to combine ideas, including the sentence beginning “although basic literacy and numerancy are necessary,” and you use both simple statements and longer clauses. However, control of sentence structure and verb forms is inconsistent, so several sentences are difficult to interpret. Examples include “It is often to argued,” “the children will teach the student,” and “Too much formal learning make feel stress.” There are also problems with agreement, articles and pronouns, as in “the mind have not freshed” and “focus on your learning.” Punctuation is sometimes confusing, particularly the semicolon in the first body paragraph. Practise accurate basic sentence patterns first, then add subordinate clauses; check that each sentence has a clear subject and correctly formed verb.

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