Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-14
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning and think that it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary schoo classroom. I agree in this statement that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
On the one hand the acedemic education learning such as Math, Enhlish and science is more improtant to leared student. These thing increses the knoweledge of student and improved basic skills like math improved solving skills and english improved the leasning and speaking skills and science improved your thaught. Therefore, childen need to study these things in early life.
On tghe other hand, student showed not spen all time in study they went to plays games and like crikcket, foot ball and other games . Panting and driwing they improved thaught and skills. Game improved the health, fitness and mind be very frish and when we play games so, we learned teamwork, comepromise with other and copreates with other. These activities creat knowledge and reduce the stree and over mind feel very releax and frish.
I agree in this statement that primary school give the good education on these subjects like math, english and science these things improved over skills and play different games in primary school these things gain the in over pratical life. When we play games over any type of strees is reduce games play the very vitial role in over life.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
You take a position by saying, “I agree,” and give relevant reasons for both formal study and play. For example, you connect academic subjects with basic skills and games with health, teamwork, and stress reduction. However, the response only partially develops the task: the reasons are mostly listed rather than explained with specific examples, and your view on how important play is alongside learning remains unclear. The conclusion repeats earlier points instead of resolving this balance. The response contains 205 words, so it is 45 words below the 250-word minimum; 34 words copied from the task prompt were not counted. Develop each main point with an explanation or example, and state clearly how classroom time should be balanced.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5
The response has a basic paragraph structure, and “On the one hand” and “On the other hand” signal a contrast between academic study and play. This gives the reader some help in following the main topics. However, progression within paragraphs is weak: several benefits are added in lists, and the final paragraph repeats ideas without bringing them together into a clear conclusion. Some links are also difficult to follow, such as “when we play games so, we learned teamwork,” while repeated use of “and” makes connections mechanical. Organise each body paragraph around one main point, explain it in a logical sequence, and use clear references and linking phrases to show how the ideas relate.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.5
You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “basic skills,” “teamwork,” “fitness,” and “stress,” so the reader can identify the main ideas. However, the range is limited and several spelling errors or inaccurate word choices make parts difficult to understand, such as “acedemic,” “thaught,” and “copreates.” Some phrases are also unnatural, including “mind be very frish” and “gain the in over pratical life.” These issues fit a response where vocabulary is basic and errors can cause difficulty. Check spelling carefully and learn common collocations for education and play. More precise wording would help you explain benefits rather than relying on repeated general terms such as “improved” and “things.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences using “and,” “when,” and “therefore,” but the range of sentence structures is limited, and many attempts at longer sentences are faulty. For example, “These thing increses the knoweledge of student” has problems with number and subject–verb agreement, while “student showed not spen all time in study” does not form a clear grammatical sentence. Verb forms and tense are also inconsistent, as in “games play the very vitial role.” These frequent errors sometimes make the intended meaning difficult to follow. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then combine them with subordinate clauses; check articles, plurals, agreement, and verb forms in each sentence.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.