Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-14
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
A portion of human beings may be under the impression that elementary schooling system may have been a little extra serious on children.
Nursery and kindergarten majorly contains light teaching along with playtime. Even after that, primary classes teach appropriate learning course. If schools do not teach formal courses, I am afraid children may not be prepared for real learning.
Elementary scholars do have designated time periods for physical activities where they play different sports and games, which is great for their physical health and get break from mental learnings, which is extremely important and play significant role in their overall growth as these years are the most important for them.
Closest example that I could think of is my niece who is in 1st grade and I got to a look through her books and homework assignments which consists of very basic topics. And when I was in elementary school, my school had balanced amount of serious classes and play time period.
In this era, parents have become extra woke and trying to run the system according to their rules and regulations. Especially in western countries, everyone got an opinion of their own rather then pinpointing the major problems, they are discussing whether their child is playing enough.
Everybody have rights to voice their concerns but I believe young students should be learning about the with focus so they can be mentally strong for their future grades as well as have appropriate fun time. Usually children also play all the time in their home after school.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
You give a discernible position: formal learning is necessary, but children should also have time to play. The examples of your niece’s basic schoolwork and your own balanced school timetable are relevant, and you explain that play supports physical health and overall growth. However, the response develops the two parts unevenly. The importance of play is mentioned, but its role in classroom learning—such as helping children cooperate, concentrate, or understand ideas—is not explained in detail. The claim that children play at home also does not fully address why classroom play matters. The comments about parents being “extra woke” and having opinions are broad and only loosely connected to the question. Develop these points with clearer reasoning and specific examples.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The response has a basic sequence: it introduces the issue, discusses formal teaching and play, gives personal examples, and ends with a view about children’s education. Paragraph breaks help separate some ideas. However, the overall progression is not consistently clear, and several points appear abruptly. For example, the discussion of parents’ opinions shifts away from the classroom balance without showing how it supports your argument. Connections within sentences are also sometimes difficult to follow, particularly the long sentence about physical activities, health, breaks, and growth. Use a clearer paragraph plan, with one paragraph explaining the value of formal learning and another developing the benefits of classroom play. More precise linking and referencing would make the argument easier to follow.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “formal courses,” “physical activities,” “overall growth,” and “balanced,” which helps communicate the main ideas. There are also attempts at less common expressions, but several choices are unnatural or imprecise, such as “a portion of human beings,” “extra serious on children,” and “mental learnings.” The informal phrase “extra woke” is not suitable for this academic discussion and makes the point about parents unclear. Some repetition of general terms such as “children,” “play,” and “learning” also limits flexibility. Aim for accurate, natural collocations and a consistently formal register—for example, describe schools as placing “too much emphasis on academic instruction” and refer to “mental fatigue” or “cognitive development” where appropriate.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, and the main position is generally understandable. However, errors in agreement, articles, and sentence construction occur across the response. For example, “Nursery and kindergarten majorly contains” has a subject–verb agreement problem, while “Everybody have rights” should use a singular verb. The sentence beginning “Elementary scholars do have designated time periods” becomes difficult to control as several ideas are joined together, and “I got to a look through” contains an unnecessary article. There are also awkward constructions such as “learning about the with focus,” which obscure the intended meaning. Practise building complex sentences around one clear main clause, then check agreement, articles, and punctuation.
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