Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Formal learning of childrens in primary schools is focused by many institutions, is argued by many people. I strongly believe that a structured learning is very crucial for students in primary schools.

Primary schools teach children basic education which is very important for a strong base of students. Moreover, these instituations also have a proper atomosphere in which students learn more and can easily foccus on their sallybus. Many educational insitituates have main goal toward study but some also foccus on Sports and games parallel with learning. They believe that game are also part of education and learning for students. So, many primary schools also offer numerous indoor and outdoor games. They also have collection of mind training useful games which required many tricks to solve. By adapting these games, students grow with many strong problem solving skills. However, They also provide physical games along with with many outdoor playgrounds. So, playing these games keep students more energetics and healthy along with study. Students also gain many other qualities in their personality through these games. Hence, these games are very important in school life along with study. For instance, in china, primary schools have main foccus is to build a strong base of student. So there instiuations have many games and learning as a part of course.

On the other hand, mostly people have contrast with this argument. They believe that schools are only consider for learning purpose. So, they should be more focused on learning rather than other activities. Moreover, They give reasons, many sports complexs are constructed for playing games. These sports insituates should built some roles in games rather then schools.

Conclusively, Building a strong base of children, primary schools are playing important role. These insituates are also well known for their other sport activities as a part of study which make students mentally more strong and build many competences in thier. So, these are very important.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You take a position in favour of structured learning, and you also explain why play matters, mentioning problem-solving, physical health and personal qualities. These are relevant responses to both questions. However, the extent of your agreement is not consistently clear: the opening strongly supports formal learning, while most of the first body paragraph argues for games, and the opposing view is only briefly described. Several points remain general; for example, the reference to China does not explain how its schools illustrate your argument. To strengthen the response, state clearly whether you think formal learning is excessive and balance that judgement with a developed explanation of how classroom play should complement learning. Add specific examples and explain their relevance.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has recognisable paragraphs for the introduction, discussion of play, an opposing view and a conclusion. Linking expressions such as “Moreover,” “However,” and “Conclusively” help signal relationships between ideas. However, the overall progression is not always clear: the opening supports formal learning, but the first main paragraph shifts to the benefits of games without clearly connecting them to the question of whether schools focus too much on formal study. The long paragraph also combines several points, while the opposing view is comparatively brief. Some links are repetitive or awkward, and references such as “these institutions” do not always make the intended connection clear. Give each paragraph one main purpose and use clearer transitions to show how each point supports your position.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “structured learning,” “problem solving skills,” “physical games,” and “personality.” This gives the reader a basic sense of the subject and allows the main ideas to be understood. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or repeated, such as “foccus on their sallybus,” “students grow with many strong problem solving skills,” and “more energetics.” Spelling errors, including “instituations” and “insituates,” also make the writing less clear and polished. Build a more precise vocabulary for education and child development, and check spelling and natural word combinations. For example, describe games as helping children “develop problem-solving skills” rather than “grow with” them.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, and some ideas are connected through clauses, as in “They believe that game are also part of education and learning for students.” However, complex sentences are often not controlled accurately, and frequent errors can make the reader pause. Examples include the opening fragment-like construction, “Formal learning of childrens in primary schools is focused by many institutions, is argued by many people,” and agreement errors such as “game are” and “these games keep students more energetics.” There are also problems with articles, plurals and sentence boundaries, including “a structured learning” and the run-on sequence beginning “However, They also provide.” Practise building clear subject–verb sentences first, then add subordinate clauses, checking agreement, articles and punctuation.

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