Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Many people argue that elementary schools are more focused towards formal learning. I partly disagree with the statement because I think that it is very important for the children to play as well as learn in classroom of primary schools.

The primary schools are playing a very important role in the children lives at the early stage. They are setting the tone that children will do in their future. The mindset of a child is building in those primary school classes and it is very important to teach them the required things. Schools which focused on formal learning only are leading the students towards study burden and because of this the students start disliking their schools and don't want to go schools. When schools are not arranging any kind of activities including some competitions or games, they are burdening the students with the work pressure. A fear of going to school is built in the mind of children at early age.

Schools should add a separate period of time for the students so they can play the games and also it will make thier mind fresh. These extra gaming periods will gain the trust of students by grabbing their attention and they want to come to school happily and also with the fresh mindset and happily. In the classroom, it is very important to teach the primary school's students with an approach of playing with them, teachers should perform some kind of activity which combines game with lesson, for example, ask students to count on their fingers that how many toys they have in their home, by doing this they will learn counting also get engaged when it comes to their own toys. Although extra gaming periods sometimes will lead them to always play and don't learn properly in regular classes and also they will be less formal sometimes.

In conclusion, extra playing periods are very important for children as well as the learning in the primary schools because it will remove the fear of school from their minds and they will happily come to school. We should manage this properly so they will not become less formal and don't set their minds just to play without any learning.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you partly disagree that primary schools focus too much on formal learning, and you argue that play should complement lessons. You address both the concern about excessive formal study and the importance of play, with relevant points about school anxiety, motivation and learning through activities. The example of counting toys usefully shows how play can support a lesson. However, some claims are asserted rather than explained—for instance, the idea that play periods “will gain the trust of students” is unclear, and the risk that children may “always play” is not explored in detail. Develop these points with clearer reasoning and a more specific example to make the response more fully supported.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a coherent overall arrangement: it introduces your view, develops the drawbacks of formal-only schooling, proposes play-based approaches, and ends with a conclusion. Paragraphing helps distinguish these stages, and links such as “because of this,” “for example,” and “In conclusion” guide the reader. At times, however, connections are mechanical or the reference is unclear. The sentence beginning “These extra gaming periods” repeats the idea of fresh minds and happy attendance, while “Although extra gaming periods sometimes will lead them…” introduces a qualification without clearly connecting it to your recommendation. Organise each body paragraph around one main point, and use clearer transitions to show how examples and counterarguments relate.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough vocabulary to discuss schooling, motivation and classroom activities, including phrases such as “study burden,” “work pressure,” “mindset” and “combines game with lesson.” These choices make your main ideas understandable, and you attempt some topic-specific language. However, several expressions are imprecise or unnatural, such as “focused towards formal learning,” “gaming periods,” and “gain the trust of students.” There is also repetition of “happily,” “fresh,” and “play,” which limits flexibility. Spelling errors such as “thier” and “schools” in “go schools” also affect accuracy. Aim for more natural collocations and vary repeated terms; for example, describe play as supporting engagement or reducing pressure.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including conditional and relative structures, and the overall meaning is generally clear. Some sentences are controlled, such as “Schools should add a separate period of time for the students so they can play the games.” However, errors occur in agreement, articles, verb forms and sentence construction. Examples include “The mindset of a child is building,” “Schools which focused,” and “they will be less formal sometimes.” The long sentence beginning “In the classroom, it is very important…” also joins several ideas in a way that makes the structure difficult to follow. Review tense consistency and article use, and divide long sentences so each clause has a clear subject and verb.

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