Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

There is a arugement about primary schools concerntrate too much on formal learning. Overall, this depicts about how primary level students are taught about formal learning only.

School is the second home every students even if the learners are from primary or secondary level. It is said that the students of primary level should olny be focused on formal learning rather than teaching and giving them time to do some extra acivities. All of the learners goes to school for education but that doesn't mean concerntrating too much on formal learning.

The arguement between the people on this particular statment is considered a waste of time and energy. Children are supposed to learn and have knowledge on every aspects, like games, sports, danc, arts and crafts and many others as we children are the one to work on development of country in the future. Teachers and instructors play a vital role in teaching their learners in each and every part of their school level and it's very essential for the children to play as well as learn in the school classroom. Playing and learning are on the same boat for the primary level students.

I personally believe all the school teachers should have the idea about impotance about adding extra activites during their formal teaching because this will make the children know and have the idea and skills on various ways of life. The childrens can get involved and interested in various sectors like sports, art and crafts, dance which may lead them to have their great future in the particular sectors.

In concluison, formal learning is also very important for the primary school classroom but it is better to think about doing the other activities for the childrensas well . Not only primary schools, every level of learners should equally be the part of extra curriculam activities that school or college organize for their betterment.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion5.0
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both parts of the question: you argue that formal learning should not dominate and state that play is “very essential” alongside learning. Your examples of sports, dance, and arts and crafts are relevant, and the conclusion recognises the value of formal study as well as other activities. However, the position is not consistently precise: the opening mainly restates the issue, and the claim that the debate is “a waste of time and energy” is unclear rather than a reasoned response. Ideas about how play benefits children are also asserted more than explained. To strengthen the response, state your degree of agreement directly and develop one or two examples by explaining how play supports learning or children’s development. The response meets the task’s length requirement; nine words copied from the prompt were not counted.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, supporting paragraphs, and a conclusion. The paragraphs generally group related points, and phrases such as “I personally believe” help signal your viewpoint. However, progression between ideas is not always clear. For example, “The argument between the people… is considered a waste of time and energy” does not connect logically to the following list of activities, and the second paragraph repeats the point that students attend school for education without advancing the argument. Linking phrases are limited, while some references, such as “this particular statement,” are vague. Give each paragraph a clear purpose, use transitions to show cause and contrast, and make pronouns and references explicit so the reader can follow how each example supports your position.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-relevant vocabulary, including “formal learning,” “development,” “skills,” and “extra activities,” and the examples of sports, dance, and arts and crafts help convey your meaning. However, the range is limited and several phrases are repeated, particularly “formal learning” and “activities.” There are also noticeable spelling and word-choice problems, such as “arugement,” “concerntrate,” “danc,” and “curriculam,” which reduce accuracy and can distract the reader. Some expressions are unnatural or imprecise, including “on the same boat” and “have their great future.” Build a more accurate range of education-related vocabulary and check spelling carefully. Prefer precise collocations, such as “complement classroom learning” or “develop a talent,” rather than translating expressions literally.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, including clauses beginning with “because” and “which,” and the main message is usually understandable. However, the range is limited, and errors occur frequently in basic sentence patterns and in attempts at more complex structures. Examples include “There is a arugement,” “every students,” “All of the learners goes,” and “The childrens can get involved”; these show problems with articles, agreement, and plural forms. The sentence beginning “The argument between the people…” is also difficult to follow because its structure does not clearly express the intended relationship between ideas. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement, articles, and singular/plural forms, then build longer sentences around one clear main clause. Proofreading sentence by sentence will help reduce errors that sometimes make meaning harder to follow.

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