Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

formal learning- formal subjects- academic activity--perform-excell

The system of education in most of the countries places emphasis only on learning formal subjects, leading some to contend that acquiring education is the single significant purpose of schools especially primary ones. However, others maintain that involvement of pupil in sports and other leisure activities is as important as their learning of formal curriculum.

Those advocating the idea of carrying the sports activities parallel with education are of the opinion that sports are crucial for keeping an individual mentally healthy. healthy minds perform excellently in academic landscapes. Sports boost the mental capibilities of students.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response identifies the topic and gives a relevant reason for including sport: it may support mental health and academic performance. However, it addresses the task only minimally. Your position on whether primary schools focus too much on formal learning is not stated clearly, and the second question—how important play is in the classroom—is not answered in a developed way. The claims that sport keeps pupils mentally healthy and boosts their capabilities are asserted but not explained or supported with an example. The response also does not meet the required minimum length, leaving both parts of the question substantially incomplete. To improve, state your degree of agreement, discuss both formal learning and play, and explain each point with a specific example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is some basic organisation: the opening introduces the contrast between formal subjects and sports, followed by a paragraph giving a reason to support sports. Linking expressions such as “However” and “Those advocating” help signal relationships between ideas. Nevertheless, the response has no clear overall progression or conclusion, and the second paragraph ends abruptly after a series of short claims. The relationship between sports, mental health, and academic performance could be made clearer by explaining each step rather than placing the statements side by side. Develop a fuller paragraph structure, with one main idea per paragraph, supporting explanation, and a concluding statement that returns to your position.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some topic-relevant vocabulary, including “formal subjects,” “curriculum,” “sports activities,” and “academic.” These choices show an attempt to discuss education in an appropriately formal way. However, the range is limited in this short response, and several expressions are awkward or imprecise, such as “carrying the sports activities parallel with education” and “academic landscapes.” There are also spelling and word-form problems, including “capibilities” and “pupil” where a plural is needed in context. Aim for natural collocations and precise terms, such as “integrate physical activity into lessons” or “academic performance.” More varied vocabulary would help you explain the benefits of play and learning clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response includes some complex sentence forms, particularly the opening sentence with “leading some to contend that…,” and the contrast introduced by “However” is understandable. However, the range remains limited, with most ideas expressed in short, simple statements. There are errors in sentence construction and agreement, for example “involvement of pupil” lacks an appropriate article or plural form, and “healthy minds perform excellently” does not clearly connect to the preceding sentence. The opening fragment, “formal learning- formal subjects- academic activity--perform-excell,” is also not a complete sentence. Practise writing complete sentences with clear subjects and verbs, and check articles, plurals, and how clauses connect.

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