Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Many people believe that primary school highly focus on formal education. While others are contradict with this statement and argue that games are also essential with the education. As far as my opinion, I discuss both of views.

In one hand, individuals are emphasize the primary educational institutes must be focus on formal education only. It is better way to build their mind-set for study and mainly attention on school education of the students. For example, primary school students try to remember mathematics subject work or lessons which are taking essential part of their higher education. If students understand basics formulas and equations, they will be able to solve the major problems in their higer studies. These resaons are generate a great impact on the higher eduction with the solid background.

On the other hand, students must play games and involve in physical activities for fresh their mind. For example, many students are frustrate with daily routine work and to explore the relaxations with help of healthy activity. Consequently, the students put their emotions and efforts in game for winning. It encourge their skill-set as well as improve mental and physical health. These healty activities playing a key role in physical and psychologically strong students.

In my opnion, physical activites and games are better for mental and physical health of the student. Government should be involve in roles and regulations of educational institutes to providing compulsary infrastructure for physical activties in schools.

In conculsion, primary schools completely focus on the primary education firslty; however, they cannot be ignore or compromise on physical activites for students.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both parts of the question by discussing formal study and the value of games and physical activity, and your position becomes clear in the final body paragraph: you favour including physical activities for children’s health. The examples about learning mathematical basics and using games to support wellbeing are relevant. However, the extent to which you agree that schools focus too much on formal learning is not clearly stated or consistently developed. The opening says you will discuss both views, while the conclusion says schools should focus on education first, leaving your overall judgement somewhat mixed. The benefits of play are also asserted more than explained. State your degree of agreement directly and develop one or two examples to show how play supports learning as well as health.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two contrasting body paragraphs, your opinion, and a conclusion. This gives the reader an overall route through the discussion, and phrases such as “On the other hand” and “In conclusion” signal changes in direction. However, some linking is mechanical, and the relationship between your stated opinion and conclusion is not fully clear. For example, you favour physical activities, but conclude that schools should focus on education first without explaining how these priorities fit together. Several sentences also repeat the same point about health or educational benefits rather than progressing the argument. Use clearer topic sentences and connect each example explicitly to the paragraph’s main claim; make references such as “these healthy activities” precise.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use vocabulary relevant to education and children’s wellbeing, including “formal education,” “basics formulas and equations,” “physical activities,” and “mental and physical health.” There are also attempts at more specific expressions such as “solid background” and “higher studies.” However, inaccurate word choice, collocation, word forms, and spelling are noticeable and sometimes make the meaning difficult to follow. Examples include “primary school highly focus,” “explore the relaxations,” “encourge their skill-set,” and “physical and psychologically strong students.” Spelling errors such as “higer,” “resaons,” and “conculsion” further reduce control. Build a reliable range by learning common academic collocations and checking word forms and spelling; prioritise natural, precise phrasing over ambitious expressions.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including conditional and cause-and-effect structures: “If students understand… they will be able to solve…” and “Consequently, the students put their emotions and efforts in game for winning.” This shows an effort to connect ideas beyond basic statements. However, errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction occur across the response and can make some sentences hard to interpret. For instance, “primary school highly focus” lacks correct agreement, while “individuals are emphasize” and “must be focus” use incorrect verb patterns. The opening sentence also joins contrasting ideas awkwardly. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement and verb patterns, and check each sentence for a clear subject and correctly formed main verb before adding more complex clauses.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.