Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In today's modern and fast paced world, some individual argue that most of the primary schools pay much attention on formal learning while other says that they focus more on creative learning. I strongly oppose this opinion as I beleive that most of primary schools are working much on creative learning as it helps to sharpen the mind of children and can take part in the development of economy and culture.

One of the primary reasons for this is that, it plays a crucial role in sahrpening the minds of students and boost the creativity of students as children who are engulf in the craetive learning thinks much more sharply and practically. And in today's develop world creative thinking and practiacal working is necessary and most of the schools are working to enhance the productivity of minds of children so they can face and live in this era of modernsim. For example, in America most f primary schools engluf students in games and other helpful activities aalong studies so that's why there most of youngesters have sharp minds and take practical and fair decision and mark there names in world history.

Another reason is that creative learning also helps in progress of culture and country. As in primary schools, students do different kind of tasks and put pressure on their min to cope with different situations and pressure is put on them to solve different kinds of puzzles. As a result of this, most of the students when grow up become a person who thinks creativly and fairly and take part in the development of country. For instance, China is consider as the world largest develop country because ther schools focus much on productivity than formal learning.

In conclusion, although formal learning have its own adavnatages but these merits are outweigh by the adavntages of creative learning . So we should make efforts to boost the creative learning as it helps in development and paly crucial role in foundation of a person.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You give a clear overall position, arguing that creative learning deserves emphasis, and you provide two reasons: it may develop children’s thinking and contribute to society. These points are relevant, but the response only partly addresses the exact question. The prompt asks whether primary schools focus too much on formal learning and how important play is alongside learning; your essay shifts to a comparison between formal and “creative” learning, without clearly explaining the role or importance of play. The examples about America and China are broad claims and are not sufficiently explained or connected to the classroom experience. To strengthen the response, state your view directly on formal learning, discuss play explicitly, and develop one or two examples with clearer reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs with separate reasons, and a conclusion. Phrases such as “One of the primary reasons” and “Another reason” help signal the progression, and the main line of argument can generally be followed. However, connections between claims are sometimes mechanical or unclear. For example, the move from creative classroom activities to “development of economy and culture” is not fully explained, and the China example does not clearly support the preceding point about students solving puzzles. Some sentences also contain several ideas joined together, making the relationships harder to track. Use clearer links between each claim, explanation, and example, and make sure each paragraph develops one central point.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt vocabulary relevant to education and development, including “formal learning,” “creative learning,” “productivity,” and “development of culture and country.” This gives you some range beyond basic everyday language. However, the range is limited by repeated use of “creative learning,” “students,” and “development,” while inaccurate word choices and collocations sometimes make meaning difficult to interpret. Examples include “pay much attention on,” “put pressure on their min,” and “mark there names in world history.” There are also frequent spelling errors, such as “beleive,” “sahrpening,” and “practiacal,” which reduce clarity and control. Aim for more precise education-related vocabulary, check spelling carefully, and choose natural collocations rather than translating phrases directly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including clauses beginning with “as,” “while,” and “because,” and you use some cause-and-effect structures. However, complex sentences are often faulty, and errors in agreement, articles, verb forms, and sentence construction occur frequently enough to make parts of the argument difficult to read. For example, “some individual argue” and “other says” have subject–verb agreement problems, while “children who are engulf … thinks” combines incorrect agreement with an unclear clause structure. The conclusion also has errors in “formal learning have” and “these merits are outweigh.” Practise building shorter, accurate sentences first, then add subordinate clauses and check that subjects and verbs agree.

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