Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

THERE IS AN ONGOING DEBATE THAT EARLY EDUCATION SYSTEMS ARE HIGHLY FOCUSING ON FORMAL LEARNING. IN MY OPINION, FORMAL EDUCATION IS CRUCIAL FOR THE CHILDREN. HOWEVER, THE EXTRACURRICULAR ACTIVITIES MUST BE THE PART OF LEARNIG. IT PLAYS PIVOTAL ROLE IN DEVELOPMENT OF COMMUNICATION SKILL AND IN MAINTANING PHYSICAL HEALTH OF THE STUDENTS.

IN A TYPICAL CLASSROOM SETUP THE TEACHERS FOCUS MORE ON BASIC EDUCATION, WHICH IS IMPORTANT FOR THIS AGE GROUP, TO LEARN HOW TO READ AND WRITE. AS A CONSEQUENCE OF FOCUSING JUST ON LEARNING SKILL THROUGH CLASSROOM SETUP, CHILDREN WILL HAVE LESS EXPOSURE TO SOCIAL INTERACTION. THEY WILL BECOME LESS CONFIDENT AND HAVE NO OR FEW FRIENDS IN FUTURE.

BY INTRODUCING FUN ACTIVITIES IN CLASSROOMS AND EXTRACURRILAR ACTIVITIES ONCE IN A WEEK PROVIDE A VIABLE SOLUTION FOR THE PUPILS TO INTERACT WITH OTHER. THESE ACTIVITIES ALSO HELP IN IMPROVING THE HEALTH OF THE STUDENTS . MANY NURSERIES FOR INSTANCE GEMS SCHOOL AND AL SALAM SCHOOL ARE FOCUSING MORE ON ACTIVITIES THAT YOUNG LEARNERS FIND INTERESTING.

TO CONCLUDE, I PARTIALLY AGREE THAT CLASSROOM LEARNING IS IMPORTANT FOR THE EARLY AGE LEARNERS, AS THEY LEARN HOW O READ AND WRITE. BUT THERE SHOULD BE A BALANCE IN FORMAL AND INFORMAL LEARNING, BOTH ARE EQUALLY IMPORTANT . THE SCHOOLS MUST INTRODUCE PLAY TIME FOR YOUNG STUDENTS WHICH WILL HELP THEM TO LEARN COMMUNICATION SKILL. THEY WILL BECOME CONFIDENT AND WILL BE ABLE TO IMPROVE THEIR PHYSICAL HEALTH. AS A CONSEQUENCE OF INTERACTION THROUGH GAMES THEY WILL BE ABLE TO MAKE FRIENDS AND DEVELOP MENTAL STRENGHT AS WELL.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you value formal learning but argue that play and other activities should also be included. You address both questions by explaining the importance of reading and writing and linking play to social interaction, confidence, and health. These are relevant points, and the examples of nursery schools help make the discussion more concrete. However, the extent of your agreement could be stated more precisely, since the opening says formal education is crucial while the conclusion says you partially agree that classroom learning is important. The benefits of play are also asserted more than explained; for instance, show how a classroom game might build communication or support learning. Developing these points with specific reasoning would make the response more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure, moving from your position to the effects of formal learning, then to activities and a conclusion. Paragraphing helps the reader follow this overall arrangement, and phrases such as “As a consequence” and “To conclude” signal relationships between ideas. Some connections are nevertheless mechanical or unclear. The second paragraph moves from limited social interaction to having few friends in the future without explaining the link, while the third begins with a long introductory phrase that makes its main point difficult to follow. The conclusion repeats several benefits already mentioned rather than synthesising them. Use clearer topic sentences and connect each claim to its explanation; vary linking expressions and make references such as “these activities” unmistakably clear.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a suitable range of topic vocabulary, including “formal learning,” “social interaction,” “extracurricular activities,” and “physical health.” Phrases such as “viable solution” and “pivotal role” show an effort to use more precise or less common language. However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or awkward, including “highly focusing on,” “the part of learning,” and “improving the health.” Spelling errors such as “learnig,” “maintaning,” “extracurrilar,” and “strenght” also reduce accuracy. These issues do not prevent the main message from being understood, but they limit the naturalness and precision of the vocabulary. Focus on accurate collocations and proofread spelling, while choosing straightforward expressions when a more ambitious phrase is uncertain.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a conditional construction (“If… children will have less exposure”) and a relative clause (“activities that young learners find interesting”). The overall meaning is generally understandable, but some grammatical errors remain. For example, “By introducing fun activities… provide a viable solution” lacks a clear grammatical subject, and “There should be a balance in formal and informal learning, both are equally important” joins two independent clauses incorrectly. There are also errors with articles and agreement, as in “plays pivotal role” and “communication skill.” Aim to make the subject of each sentence explicit, check article use and singular/plural forms, and separate or correctly join complete clauses. More consistently controlled complex sentences would strengthen the response.

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