Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Some people believe that primary schools should focus on formal learning rather than not focusing on their others co-curricular activities such as playing. I would argue with this point and oppose that education system from early hold just focus on learning however extra curricular activities build confidence and play crucial role in maintaining health.

From an early age students in his primary level are in growing phase however they are not in a sense of saying but indirectly there would be an individual among them who have to do detail go through on their physical health.In primary school there would be coach or Sir who focuses on their health by engaging them in pyhscial activities such as playing,running and tug of war which leads in enhancing their Endurance and physical health from early age.As a result , in future students are be more brave and having strong immune system and participating in competitions.

on the other hand, from the primary education level students are learning basics.If basics are more cleared and well defined therefore in future they will be capable of facing more hectic issues in secondary level of education and assist the facing real world issues.for example, a maths addition, subtraction is well cleared to student from the primary level in future when they own a shop it will assist him calculating more amount.

Consequently,students in primary level are in growing phase they need individual who go through on their health in the form of playing.on the other hand, in primary level student needs to strong their basics so therefore they can easily solve real world problems heading towards them

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You take a position against prioritising formal learning alone, and you address both play and the value of learning basic skills. The examples of running and tug of war, and of using addition and subtraction when running a shop, are relevant to the question. However, the discussion is only partly developed: the benefits of play are mainly asserted, while the shop example explains basic learning more than how classroom play should be balanced with it. Your position is also not fully consistent, since the opening opposes a focus on formal learning, but the second body paragraph strongly supports it without clearly stating how the two should be combined. Explain the extent of your agreement directly and develop a balanced answer to both questions.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has an introduction, separate paragraphs for physical activity and basic learning, and a concluding summary, so the reader can identify its main topics. However, progression within paragraphs is often difficult to follow because several ideas are joined into long, unclear sentences. For example, the first body paragraph moves from children’s development to a coach, physical activities, endurance, and future confidence without clearly explaining each link. Connectors such as “on the other hand” and “Consequently” are used, but the contrast between the two body paragraphs is not fully explained, and the conclusion repeats earlier points rather than resolving the balance between play and formal learning. Use clearer topic sentences and shorter, logically connected explanations.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “co-curricular activities,” “physical health,” “endurance,” and “real world issues.” These choices show an effort to discuss education and children’s development, but the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, sometimes making the meaning difficult to interpret. For instance, “oppose that education system from early hold just focus on learning” does not express your position clearly, and “go through on their physical health” is not a natural way to describe supporting children’s health. There are also spelling and form errors, such as “pyhscial” and “more amount.” Build a bank of accurate topic phrases and check spelling and collocations before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences with clauses, such as the sentence beginning “If basics are more cleared and well defined.” However, complex structures are often faulty, and frequent errors in agreement, verb forms, articles, and sentence boundaries make parts of the response hard to understand. Examples include “students in his primary level,” “there would be an individual … who have to,” and “students are be more brave.” Several sentences also run together or lack clear punctuation, particularly in the first body paragraph. Practise building accurate sentences with one main idea at a time, then add subordinate clauses only when you can control their structure. Check subject–verb agreement and verb forms during editing.

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