Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In primary schools, some people argue that formal learning follows a planned syllabus, a set timeline, and defined learning objectives. people focus on formal learning because it is career-oriented and dedicated to learning. There are some points where we can agree with this opinion about formal studies.

On the another important things which we discussed about childerns those who can play in the primary schools during learning in classrooms. As such, some people need to manage both in parallel way formal learning and playing in the classroom. There are some people who can manage both scenarios. As we think that learning and playing are both important to manage this those things.

Activities such as outdoor games and mind game sessions help children develop creativity, communication skills and team work. For example, when children participate in team sports, they learn to follow rules, solve problems and respect their classmates. These skills are just as valuable as academic knowledge.

In my opinion, primary schools should combine formal education with play-based learning. Teachers can make lessons more interesting by using educational games, story telling and practical experiments. This approach allows children to understand difficult concepts while enjoying the learning process. It also helps them develop socially, emotionally and physically.

In conclusion, although formal education is necessary for building a strong academic foundation, excessive focus on it can limit children’s overall development. Therefore, I believe that play should be an essential part of primary school education, if we need focus on these things then learning and playing make them more activated.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both parts of the question and make your position clear: formal education is necessary, but play should be an essential part of primary schooling. The examples of team sports and educational games are relevant, and you explain how play can build communication, problem-solving and social skills. However, the opening paragraph does not clearly explain how far you agree that schools focus too much on formal learning. The second paragraph also repeats the need to balance learning and play without developing a distinct reason or example. To strengthen the response, state your degree of agreement directly and extend each main point with a specific classroom example or explanation.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable overall structure, with an introduction, supporting paragraphs and a conclusion. The paragraph about team sports progresses logically from activities to the skills children gain, and phrases such as “For example” help signal support. However, the first two paragraphs do not establish a clear progression: the second begins “On the another important things” and repeats the idea of balancing learning and play rather than adding a new point. Some linking language is mechanical, particularly “As such” and “As we think.” Organise the body around distinct reasons, and use clear topic sentences and references so each paragraph develops one step in your argument.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “formal education,” “play-based learning,” “academic foundation,” and “overall development.” These choices help communicate the central argument, and terms such as “communication skills” and “practical experiments” are appropriate. However, some wording is repetitive or imprecise, especially “manage both,” “both scenarios,” and “these things.” There are also inaccurate forms and collocations, such as “mind game sessions,” “team work,” and “story telling.” Aim for more precise phrasing and check standard word forms: for instance, describe “educational puzzles,” write “teamwork” and “storytelling,” and use “balance academic learning with play” instead of repeatedly saying “manage both.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use a mixture of simple sentences and some longer structures, including the conditional-style explanation “Teachers can make lessons more interesting by using…” and the contrast in your conclusion beginning “although.” Most sentences communicate the intended meaning, but some grammatical errors remain. Examples include “On the another important things,” “children those who can play,” and “if we need focus on these things,” where articles, sentence structure or verb patterns are not controlled. Capitalisation is also inconsistent at the start of “people focus.” Practise building clear subject–verb sentences and checking articles and verb patterns; for example, “Schools should balance formal learning with play” is more controlled than the second paragraph’s opening.

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