Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In this period of modernity, many people often argued that primary levels of institution teach only subjective topics but not focus on the obejctives knowledge. In my opinion, I strongly agree with this notion, and my opinion will be discussed in further paragraphs with suitable conclusion.

Supporting my agreement to the given statement, I firmly believe that most of the teachers don't give the value of the extra-curriculum activites. Rather, they fix with the classes and exams as well as encourage parents making their childerns only stuck on the books, syllabus. To cite an example, many institutions provide strict schedules to the students as well as parents about the classes and exams that the children can't get a chance to play outside. Moreover, the teacher influence parents and childrens to stuck on the subject-based lessons.

Explaining some of the another supporting points in favor, it is true that parents and teachers both have lacking of knowledge about objectives studies such as playing, participating in competition and so on. They even do not want to learn about that and always avoid the topic. For instance, parents and teachers think that children at their age should be taught only the subjective knowledge assuming outsides activities waste of time. As a result, primary level students don't get much opportunities to participate in international competitions or in games.

In conclusion, primary education should focus not only on subjective learning but also on objective learning. I believe that aforementioned points are strongly supporting my view points.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

Your position is clear: you agree that primary schools place too much emphasis on formal learning, and you give relevant reasons, including exam-focused schedules and adults’ attitudes towards play. However, the response only partially addresses the task because the second question—how important play is alongside learning in the classroom—is not directly answered. Most examples describe children being unable to play or join competitions, rather than explaining how classroom play supports learning or development. The ideas are also under-developed: for example, the claim that play is valuable is implied, but its benefits are not explained. State your view on the importance of play explicitly, then support it with a specific benefit and example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion. Each body paragraph focuses on a related reason, and signposts such as “Moreover,” “For instance” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the discussion. However, progression is sometimes mechanical: both body paragraphs repeat the idea that teachers and parents prioritise subject-based study, without clearly building a new line of argument. Some references are also unclear, as in “that the children can’t get a chance,” where the connection between the schedule and the result could be expressed more directly. The conclusion restates the position but does not draw together the reasons or address classroom play. Develop a clearer sequence and use linking phrases to show relationships between ideas, not just to announce them.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “strict schedules,” “classes and exams,” “subject-based lessons” and “international competitions,” so the main subject is generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several inaccurate or unnatural choices make parts of the response difficult to interpret. For example, “subjective topics” and “objectives knowledge” do not clearly express the contrast between academic study and practical or play-based learning; “extra-curriculum activities” is also an inaccurate form. Spelling errors such as “obejctives,” “activites” and “childerns” further reduce precision. Build a more accurate set of education-related expressions and check word forms and spelling. Prefer familiar, precise collocations over ambitious phrases whose meaning is unclear.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including clauses introduced by “that,” “as well as” and “assuming.” This shows an effort to vary sentence structure, but complex constructions are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to make some sentences hard to follow. For example, “they fix with the classes and exams” has an incomplete grammatical pattern, while “encourage parents making their childerns only stuck on the books” does not form a clear clause. There are also problems with agreement and sentence construction in “parents and teachers both have lacking of knowledge” and “students don’t get much opportunities.” Practise building accurate subject–verb–object sentences first, then add subordinate clauses. Check verb forms, articles and singular/plural agreement during revision.

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