Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-25
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
As far as this topic is concerned, I would like to say that the impact of learning in primary schools, which has always been debatable and now has become controversial, with many people claiming that it is beneficial for the children to participate in sports at early childhood but other people reject this notion. The substantial influence of this debate has sparked the controversy over the potential impact in recent years. In my opinion, the former proposition appears to be more rational. This essay with further elaborate my views for positive and negative impact of playing as well as learning in the primary school.
Analyzing the statement and explaing furthermore, firstly many schools just focus on learning because they believe that education or learning is the basic duty of the school. Secondly, sports and other activities require both money and managemant and many parents can't afford the fee and government dont provide enogh funds for the schools to organize these type of learning or activities.
I think physical activities are very important for primary school children because there body is in developing stage and require strength that comes from physical activities. Secondly, sports also makes the brain sharp and active that also helps them in quick learning.
Moving forward, it is pertinent to mention that it is the basic duty of the government to make policies and provide funds for primary school so the children better perform. Also, it is imperative for the autorities concerned to look into the factors behind this issue and take drastic actions where necessary.
To encapsulate, I agree with the statement that many primary school focus on basic learning only but physical activites are very important in this age. So, I would like to appeal to the learned authorities to come forward, focus their gaze and launch a vigorous compaign to reform this issue across the globe.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
You take a position in favour of children having physical activity, and you give relevant reasons: exercise supports physical development, while sports may help children stay alert and learn. You also identify why schools may prioritise formal lessons, including costs and limited government funding. However, the response only partly answers the task. It does not clearly explain how play should be balanced with classroom learning, and the discussion of formal learning is brief and general. The opening and conclusion refer to the issue, but the central ideas need fuller explanation and specific examples. Develop each reason by showing how it affects children’s learning or wellbeing, and state more directly how much you agree that schools focus too heavily on formal study.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate body paragraphs and a conclusion. Basic signposting such as “Firstly,” “Secondly,” and “Moving forward” helps readers identify stages of the discussion. However, progression is not consistently clear: the first body paragraph explains why schools may focus on lessons, while the next supports physical activity, but the relationship between these points and the question’s balance of play and learning is not made explicit. Several linking phrases, including “Analyzing the statement and explaining furthermore,” feel formulaic rather than useful, and the final paragraph introduces an appeal to authorities instead of drawing together the argument. Use topic sentences that directly answer each part of the prompt, and connect each supporting point to your position.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You attempt a range of topic-related and formal vocabulary, including “physical activities,” “developing stage,” “policies,” and “provide funds.” This gives you some means of discussing education and children’s development. However, the range is limited by repeated general terms such as “issue,” “activities,” and “learning,” while several ambitious phrases are unnatural or imprecise. For example, “the substantial influence of this debate has sparked the controversy” repeats the idea of controversy without adding meaning, and “focus their gaze” is not an appropriate collocation in this context. Spelling errors such as “managemant,” “enogh,” and “compaign” also reduce accuracy. Prefer clear, precise expressions and check spelling and collocations carefully.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt both simple sentences and longer structures, including a relative clause in the opening and a reason clause beginning “because.” Meaning is generally recoverable, but control is uneven, particularly in longer sentences. The opening is incomplete: “I would like to say that the impact … with many people claiming…” lacks a clear main clause, and “This essay with further elaborate” has an incorrect verb construction. There are also recurring agreement and article errors, as in “sports also makes” and “many primary school focus,” as well as “there body.” These errors sometimes make the reader pause. Build shorter, complete sentences first, then add complex clauses with accurate subject–verb agreement, articles and pronouns.
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