Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

It is reported that primary school especially in our country just focus on traditional learning and this system retained students to just memorize by rote. From my perspective, I completely agree with this that these schools has make students just a learning dimi and they even do not try solve different simple and complex problems.

I argue that in our country most of the schools had once made a syllabus for their all sections of classes which is using for almost twenty plus years means they are all outdated study schemes that are still applying on the students nowadays. It means that students are studying that syllabus which is studied even by our ancestors. Means theydo not ready to learning for their modern society. This will block their mind and they don't think about new creatives and they are all satisfy with formal lifestyle. In my opinion, primary schools have to introduce a new scheme of study which influence students to build problem soving skills from the basics. This will create a strong mindset in growing youth and they have determined to build something that really pays of their hardwork not only by learn by heart but also create innovations.

I consider

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You take a clear position, stating, “I completely agree,” and give a relevant concern: outdated syllabuses may encourage memorisation rather than problem-solving. However, the response addresses the task only partially. Most of the discussion focuses on curriculum age and innovation, while the second question—how important play is alongside learning in the classroom—is not answered. The claim that formal learning blocks children’s thinking is also asserted rather than supported with a specific example or explanation. The response is 48 words below the required minimum, which further limits the opportunity to develop your reasons. To improve, address both questions directly and explain how play supports learning, perhaps with a classroom example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is some organisation: the opening states your position, and the next paragraph develops the concern about outdated syllabuses. This gives the reader a basic sense of the topic. However, progression is limited because the response does not move on to the task’s question about play, and the final fragment, “I consider,” leaves the ending incomplete. Linking is also repetitive or awkward, particularly the repeated use of “It means” and “Means.” Paragraphing separates the main points, but the ideas within the second paragraph are not always clearly connected. Use a simple plan with an introduction, one paragraph on formal learning, one on play, and a conclusion; then use clear links to show how each point supports your position.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “traditional learning,” “memorize by rote,” “syllabus,” and “problem solving skills,” so the reader can identify your main concern. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or unclear, such as “learning dimi,” “new creatives,” and “formal lifestyle.” These expressions make parts of the argument difficult to understand. Spelling and word-form problems, including “soving” and “hardwork,” also reduce precision. Aim for familiar, accurate academic phrases rather than attempting unclear expressions: for example, describe pupils as “passive learners” and refer to “creative thinking.” Proofread spelling and check that each chosen phrase conveys the intended meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, including a relative clause in “a syllabus … which is using for almost twenty plus years.” However, complex structures are often faulty, and frequent errors sometimes make the meaning difficult to follow. Examples include “these schools has make,” “they even do not try solve,” and “they are all satisfy,” which show problems with agreement, verb forms, and infinitive patterns. Articles and sentence construction also need attention in phrases such as “primary school especially in our country.” Some sentences run together or use incomplete constructions, as in “Means theydo not ready to learning.” Practise building accurate subject–verb–object sentences first, then add subordinate clauses, checking verb forms and agreement carefully.

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