Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-28
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In this contemporary world, primary schools education system has become more developed to improve children's mental health and overall well-being . Some people believe that primary schools focus comparatively much more on formal learning than traditional learning . I am agree with this statement .
It is important for a primary school student to learn attentively from lessons . From their childhood they adopt the techniqes of learning while playing . Playing is crucial for proper development of a children . It helps them to become more confident and active. After a class they need short time break for refreshment . Thus , they may able to put much concentration on studies . Classroom should be decorated with posters and banners , which will help children to learn many things by watching those posters and banners. It is also a part of formal education . For instance, to keep pace with the digital world , Bangladesh has set a standard for primary school childern to learn from the school and they have playground to play besides learning .
Playing games or sports help children to grow faster . After a monotonous lecture , student need some area to become unwind and active their brain . Therefore , only reading and writing are not merely pivotal for children's growth , playing with other students help them to learn how to communicate with others , how to grow manners , how to play and respect others . However , classroom teaches children how to become a good person first .
To consolidate everything , I am agree with that as well as learning , children should provide a space for playing at a primary school . Formal learning consists of those facilities for children to develop them mentally and physically .At the end of the day , children can grow their interest in learning , if they provide vaious facilities to overcome stress and express their desire in playing .
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
You give a clear general position: you agree that children need play alongside formal learning, and you address both the value of lessons and the benefits of play. Relevant points include confidence, concentration, communication and respect for others. However, the response only partly develops the question of whether schools focus too much on formal learning. The Bangladesh example is mentioned but not explained, and the claim that “classroom teaches children how to become a good person first” is unclear and sits uneasily beside your support for play. To strengthen the response, state more precisely how much you agree and develop each main reason with a specific explanation or example.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and the ideas generally relate to the topic. Linking expressions such as “For instance,” “Therefore” and “To consolidate everything” help signal relationships. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow: the discussion moves from breaks to classroom posters and then to Bangladesh without clearly connecting these points. Some links are also mechanical, and references such as “those posters and banners” and “they” require the reader to infer what is meant. Organise each paragraph around one central claim, then explain it and give a directly relevant example. This would make the overall argument easier to follow.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “formal learning,” “development,” “concentration,” “communicate” and “respect,” and you attempt less common expressions such as “monotonous lecture” and “pivotal.” However, the range is limited by repeated general words such as “children,” “learning” and “playing,” while several choices or combinations are inaccurate or unnatural. Examples include “primary schools education system,” “become unwind,” “grow manners” and “various facilities to overcome stress.” Spelling errors such as “techniqes,” “childern” and “vaious” also reduce accuracy. Build a more precise vocabulary for classroom activities and child development, and check collocations and spelling when revising.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a conditional structure in “children can grow their interest in learning, if they provide…” and a relative clause in “which will help children…”. However, complex attempts are often faulty, and errors in agreement, articles and verb forms occur frequently enough to make some sentences difficult to read. For example, “I am agree” should be “I agree,” “Playing games or sports help” needs subject–verb agreement, and “a children” should be “a child” or “children.” Sentence boundaries and punctuation are also inconsistent, with spaces before commas and full stops. Practise accurate basic sentence patterns first, then extend them with subordinate clauses.
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