Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Schools play curcial role in children development and learning process. Some people believe that primary schools focus too much on formal learning. i strong agree this view because schools give more intention to exams system and homework rather than play or sport.

The first reason why school are more on formal learning is exams system. Children Evaluation is based on exam that held on every month. this can lead to pressure and stress on mental health because student whole study dependent on the resulth of exams. for example, a student prepare math exams and worry about his grade, do not have time to play with peers. therefore when students are busy in examination system, he do not time for family and friends.

The other reason is homework that children get from school. after spending many hours in school, students give time to homework with other teacher. children do not have time for other activities such as football and tennis. as a sum, there is a big hole develop in children mental wel-being, because they all time focus on school learning and homework.

However, school learning system is significant for children growth and disciplines. Children read different subject and feel improvement in their personality. But learning system Restraints students capabilities in games.

In conclusion, from my prespective, primary school focus on learning process. Students are involved in examination process and homework. Due to this, they do not enough time for other activities such as sport and other game with peers. Although, learning is important for the development process of children but is also create stress for children

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You take a clear position in favour of the view, stating that you “strong[ly] agree,” and give relevant reasons: exam pressure and homework can reduce time for play. The response also recognises that learning matters, so it engages with both sides. However, the second question—how important play is in the classroom—is not answered directly or developed enough. The examples mainly describe children losing time for sport and friends outside class, rather than explaining how classroom play supports learning or development. The point about personality and discipline is also brief and does not fully balance your argument. Develop each main idea with a clearer explanation and a specific example, and state explicitly why play should have an important place alongside formal learning.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two paragraphs giving reasons, a contrasting point, and a conclusion. Linking phrases such as “The first reason,” “The other reason,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the basic sequence. However, progression is sometimes repetitive: exams and homework are both presented mainly as reasons children lack time for activities, and the conclusion repeats this without adding a clear final judgement about classroom play. Some connections are unclear, particularly “as a sum” and the shift from the benefits of learning to “But learning system…” in the fourth paragraph. Use more precise transitions and organise each paragraph around one distinct claim, followed by explanation and an example.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “formal learning,” “exams,” “homework,” “pressure,” “stress,” and “mental health,” so the main ideas are generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several inaccurate word choices or collocations make parts difficult to interpret. For example, “give more intention to exams system” does not clearly express the intended meaning, while “a big hole develop in children mental wel-being” is unnatural and unclear. There are also spelling errors such as “curcial,” “resulth,” and “prespective.” Build a more precise set of phrases for discussing education and play, and check spelling and collocations. More accurate wording would help you explain the effects of play and formal study with greater clarity.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt some longer sentences, including the explanation that exam pressure affects children’s time for play, and you use basic cause-and-effect structures such as “because” and “therefore.” However, the range is limited, and errors occur frequently in sentence structure, agreement, articles, and verb forms. Examples include “Schools play… role,” “Children Evaluation is based on exam,” and “he do not time for family and friends.” Capitalisation and punctuation are also inconsistent, as in “i strong agree” and the lower-case sentence beginnings after full stops. These errors sometimes make the intended meaning harder to follow. Practise accurate simple sentences first, then add controlled complex clauses, checking subject–verb agreement and complete verb phrases.

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