Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It is often argued that primary education focus too much on structured learning because it plays an essential role in children's development. I absolutely agree to this statement as young children needs to experience the life beyond the textbook. In my opinion play hold pivotal role in classroom learning to enhance creativity, cognitive development amd social skills of the students.

One reason why I believe that primary school sometimes focus too much on study which made student to spend most of their time in textbook while completing the assignment given by the professor. Although, all subjects including Mathematics, science is equally important having an experience beyond academic books give confidence to the student to build up their confidence in problem solving. An overly focus classroom can directly affect the interest of childrens learning capabilities due to pressurize environment which can stress them out in a negative way and may hamper in their exploring nature. Therefore, primary schools should not exclusively focus on academic learning only.

I believe that play is equally important as learning any subjects in a classroom because it helps the children to learn in a enjoyable manner with full of joy. Activities such as group games, puzzles and role playing helps to enhance the creativity of the young ones while developing their social interaction as well. For instance, when children build something using block they learn to solve problem by themself through block building, while in role playing they get to understand the background of the characters and build their communication skills. For these reasons, teacher should always combine both study and extra activities to make children learning is enjoyable and fun.

In conclusion, I agree that sometime primary school focuses highly on academic learning, while palying plays significant roles to develop quick learning for childrens. Therefore, teacher should equally pay attention to both learning through subject and by having extra curiculum activities to grab student interest.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear: you agree that primary schools can overemphasise formal study, and you explain why play matters. You address both questions, giving relevant reasons such as the effects of pressure on children and the benefits of games, puzzles and role-play. The block-building example also helps illustrate how play can develop problem-solving. This meets the task well, but the two parts are not equally developed: the discussion of excessive formal learning remains fairly general, and the importance of play could be explained more fully in relation to classroom learning. To strengthen the response, develop one or two claims with clearer cause-and-effect explanation or a more specific example, while maintaining your position throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs addressing the main ideas, and a conclusion. Paragraphs generally progress logically, and signposts such as “One reason,” “For instance” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the argument. The examples in the play paragraph are placed appropriately after the general claim. However, some links are mechanical or unclear. For example, “Although, all subjects…” does not connect smoothly to the preceding sentence, and the conclusion repeats the main points rather than drawing them together. Some references, such as “it” in the opening, are not fully clear. For stronger progression, use more precise links between claims and explanations, and ensure each sentence’s relationship to the previous one is explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for the topic, including relevant terms such as “structured learning,” “cognitive development,” “problem solving” and “social interaction.” Phrases such as “role playing” and “exploring nature” show an attempt to express ideas beyond basic vocabulary. However, some word choices and collocations are inaccurate or repetitive, which limits precision: “build up their confidence in their confidence” repeats an idea, while “an overly focus classroom” and “quick learning” do not express the intended meanings naturally. There are also spelling errors, including “amd,” “palying” and “curiculum.” Aim to check spelling and choose natural combinations—for example, “an overly academic classroom” and “accelerate learning”—so your vocabulary communicates ideas more precisely.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including clauses introduced by “because,” “while” and “although.” This allows you to explain reasons and give examples, and the overall meaning is generally understandable. Some grammatical errors remain, particularly with subject–verb agreement, plurals, articles and sentence construction. For example, “primary education focus” should have a singular verb, and “young children needs” should use a plural verb. In “Activities … helps,” the plural subject also requires a plural verb. The sentence beginning “Although, all subjects…” is not correctly connected to the main clause, and “make children learning is enjoyable” has an unclear structure. Review agreement and practise joining dependent clauses to complete sentences; this will improve accuracy while preserving your range.

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