Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Some people argue that primary schools rely majorly on formal learning. I agree with this view because primary schools follow a designed curriculum and pupils do examinations more frequently to check whether they have understood what they have been learning.

To begin with, primary schools are provided with curricular that they are expected to follow throughout the school terms. This curriculum go hand in hand with the textbooks that learners receive in each grade. For instance, there are specific strands that are needed to be taught in each subjects. This topics have a duration in which the teacher is expected to cover them and give a report to their head teacher. Consequently, teachers are provided with pedagogical methods to help them facilitate learning in classrooms in order to finish the syllabus before the lapse of the stipulated time frame. As a result, there is no time for learners to engage in informal learning since they need to work within time set.

Formal education need regular examinations to asses learners ability to memorise what they have been taught in school. This is seen in most primary schools because learners are frequently doing assessments after every school term. For instance, in Kenya, pupils are subjected to national exams after completing their primary education. After the results, the government stakeholders hold a meeting to review the curriculum for each learning area considering how the students had performed. As a result learners are only being prepared for formal education.

Although formal learning equips learners with knowledge and helps them become more competitive in future, play is also fundamental in a child's growth because learners need to have play breaks to help them build their social and practical skills. This may be important for children who do not perform well academically because they will also feel included.

In conclusion, both play and formal education are valuable because they help learners with holistic growth.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you agree that primary schools emphasise formal learning, and you also recognise that play supports children’s development. The curriculum and assessment paragraphs are relevant, with the Kenyan examination example helping to ground your point. However, the two parts of the prompt are not developed equally. You explain why formal learning dominates, but the importance of classroom play is addressed mainly in one sentence about social and practical skills and inclusion. The conclusion says both are valuable without clarifying how play and formal instruction should be balanced. Develop this side with a specific example of learning through play and explain its benefits to children’s learning or wellbeing.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction states your view, the body develops reasons for formal learning, a contrasting point introduces play, and the conclusion summarises your position. Paragraphing helps readers follow this progression, and links such as “To begin with,” “For instance,” and “Although” make relationships between ideas clear. This already gives the essay a logical structure. At times, however, the progression is somewhat mechanical, with repeated cause-and-effect links such as “Consequently” and “As a result.” Some references are also unclear, as in “This topics,” where the reader must infer what “this” refers to. Use a wider range of transitions and make references explicit to strengthen the flow.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for the topic, including “curriculum,” “pedagogical methods,” “assessments,” and “holistic growth.” These choices help communicate ideas about schooling, and the Kenyan example is expressed in relevant terms. There are also some inaccurate or unnatural word choices and collocations, such as “rely majorly on formal learning,” “do examinations,” and “the lapse of the stipulated time frame.” “Curricular” is also not the natural noun in “provided with curricular.” These do not prevent understanding, but they limit precision and naturalness. Aim for more conventional academic collocations and check whether a word is being used in the correct grammatical form, especially when discussing curriculum and assessment.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including a clear concession in “Although formal learning equips learners with knowledge…”. Most sentences communicate their main meaning, and the essay’s overall message remains easy to follow. Some grammatical errors persist, particularly with subject–verb agreement, articles, and plurals: “This curriculum go” should be “This curriculum goes,” and “in each subjects” should be “in each subject.” In “Formal education need regular examinations,” the singular subject requires “needs”; “assess learners ability” also needs a possessive form. Review agreement and noun forms, and proofread punctuation around introductory phrases. More consistently accurate complex sentences would improve control.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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