Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-30
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Schools play a very crucial role in development of students' minds and personalities. Some guardians believe that primary schools focus a lot on conventional learning. I strongely agree with this point as students are not polished as the way they should be instead they are only forced toward the conventional way of learning.
Extra curricular activities enhances body growth as well as thought process. From my perspective, physical activities are as much important for children as the learning is, because it allows body to grow which in result helps is learning process.
Primary school donot have sufficent facilities for providing practical learning to children. The fee of primary schools are very less with comparison to the high schools as a result their budgets are so concised. Computer labs and specialist trainers are required for practical training of students but with the available funds of the institutes only theoretical training is possible. For Instance, a primary school with limited funds cannot provide practical training. Therefore, lack of resources prevents students from getting practical education.
Co-curricular activities involve various physical practices that children prerforms unconciously and are very important for their growth of body and development of brain. Mind works actively if body do so, thats why children should be allowed to play whatever they want and as a result their mind works sharply, ultimately they perform well in studies. Therefore childrens should devote time to both studies and co-curricular activities.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
You give a clear position by stating, “I strongly agree,” and you address both formal learning and the value of play. The discussion of limited facilities and budgets is relevant, while the explanation that physical activity can support concentration offers a second reason. However, the response only partially develops the task: the resource argument focuses on practical education rather than directly explaining why schools place too much emphasis on formal learning, and the example of a school with limited funds remains hypothetical and repetitive. The importance of classroom play is asserted but not illustrated with a specific example. The response is also 11 words below the required minimum. Develop each reason with a concrete example and explain more directly how play should balance formal lessons.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, a paragraph about resources and practical learning, and a final paragraph on play and development. Linking expressions such as “as a result,” “Therefore,” and “From my perspective” help signal relationships between ideas. However, progression is limited because the second paragraph repeats the point that limited funds prevent practical learning, and the final paragraph circles around the same claim that play improves the mind and study performance. Some connections are unclear, particularly the shift from school fees and budgets to the claim that only theoretical training is possible. Use each paragraph to develop a distinct reason, and make the relationship between formal learning, practical learning, and play explicit. More precise referencing would also help readers follow the argument.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “conventional learning,” “practical learning,” “co-curricular activities,” and “development of brain.” This gives the response a basic range suited to the subject. However, the range is limited and several noticeable spelling, word-form, and collocation errors make the writing less natural, such as “strongely,” “donot,” “sufficent,” “concised,” and “prerforms unconciously.” Phrases such as “growth of body” and “mind works sharply” are understandable but imprecise. Aim to use accurate, natural combinations rather than repeating broad terms such as “learning” and “activities.” Proofreading spelling and choosing more precise expressions would make your ideas clearer and more convincing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including a reason clause with “because” and a result structure using “as a result.” However, the range is limited, and errors occur frequently enough to affect clarity. For example, “I strongely agree … as students are not polished as the way they should be” has an awkward comparison and faulty sentence construction; “Extra curricular activities enhances” has a subject–verb agreement error; and “the fee … are” mismatches a singular subject with a plural verb. There are also problems with articles, plurals, and sentence boundaries, as in “Therefore childrens should devote time.” Practise building accurate sentences with one main idea, then add subordinate clauses carefully. Check agreement, articles, and punctuation during revision.
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