Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is widely believed that early education schools for children pay too much attention on traditional learning , I am strongly in agreement with the view that schools put extra learning burden on children because they think that at the early age the children have their capacity at peak to learn new things fast,I also believe that besides formal learning, games are also of equal importance for the child's physical well being.

From my perspective, primary schools involve children in lot of learning activities to make their base knowledge strong.The reason behind this is that in an early age children are naturally very good at learning new thing with fast pace.The children can learn their basic theoritical knowledge in very affective manner and children can recall these lessons very easily for the rest of their lives which they have learned in their early education period.

On the other side, it is equally important for children to engage in some of the physical activities at a classroom level to maintain their physical health level because physical activities are very esssential for good health of the children and also they are important means to keep the child's mind fresh which will develop essential life lessons in children mind's like cooperation,helping and guidance.Furthermore, the learning at classroom ismalso the major source for children to make their foudation strong for higher studies as strong biulding always built on the strong base otherwise it has low reliability to withstand the long time.

All things considered,both the learning and physical activities are essential for the children overall mental and physical grouth because they develop important skillls of learning and regular life among children.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You give a clear overall position: you agree that formal learning receives too much attention and argue that play and physical activity are also important. You address both questions, and your points about building foundational knowledge and developing cooperation are relevant. However, the response does not fully explain why schools place too much emphasis on formal learning or show what a better balance would look like. The claim that children learn quickly at an early age is repeated rather than supported with a specific example, and the benefits of play are listed more than developed. To strengthen the response, explain the consequences of excessive formal instruction and illustrate how classroom play supports learning as well as wellbeing.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has an introduction, two main paragraphs and a conclusion, so the reader can identify its broad structure. The ideas are generally relevant, and transitions such as “On the other side” and “All things considered” signal a change of focus and a conclusion. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear: the second body paragraph moves from physical health to life lessons and then to the foundation for higher studies without clearly connecting these points. Some linking is mechanical, and long sentences make relationships between ideas harder to follow. Use clearer topic sentences, separate distinct points, and make references explicit—for example, explain how the “physical activities” lead to the cooperation and helping skills mentioned.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “formal learning,” “physical activities,” “cooperation,” and “foundation,” which helps communicate the main ideas. There are also attempts at more specific phrasing, such as “physical well being” and “higher studies.” However, word choice and collocation are often inaccurate or repetitive, as in “attention on,” “make their base knowledge strong,” and “physical health level.” Spelling errors such as “theoritical,” “esssential,” and “foudation” also reduce accuracy. These issues do not prevent the reader from understanding the general message, but they make some expressions awkward. Aim for more natural academic collocations and check spelling carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including explanations linked with “because” and a concluding sentence beginning “All things considered.” This shows some range, but control is inconsistent, particularly in longer sentences. For example, the opening sentence joins several ideas with commas, creating a run-on structure, while “children have their capacity at peak” has an unclear grammatical construction. There are also errors with articles, plurals and sentence boundaries, as in “in an early age” and “children mind’s.” Punctuation spacing and comma use are inconsistent. Build accuracy by dividing long sentences into shorter units and checking each sentence for a clear subject, verb and complete clause.

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