Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It is argued that formal learning is focus more than the practical learning . From my prespective besides the formal learning the practical learning and play should also be encouraged which is benefical for their physical as well as mental health. Moreover, the formal learning makes them consistence and disciplined. Therfore, school should find a better balance between studying and recreational activities.

On the one hand, the formal learning is quite benefical for the children because primary school is the place where pupils get their basic skills of readiing, writing and mathmatics. These skills provides a strong foundation for their future foundation. Moreover, the structured lessons can teach children how to concentrate, follow instructions and become independent. However if children spend most of their time in studying they became frustrated and anxious. Due to which their creativity level decreases and steadily they become a book worm.

In contrast, I believe that playing is equally important for pupils. In games they learn how to work under a team, co-operation and disciplined. Due to physical activities they becam active , physically and mentally fit which is also crucial for the learners mental health. For instance, a child perform better when they have recreational activities along with formal learning. That's why trips are arranged for hiking or at natural places.

In conclusion, i believe that formal learning is benefical for students along with some outdoor activities which plays a vital role in life of pupils and they learn experience which can not be gained by formal learning.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear: you support formal learning but argue that play and practical activities should also be encouraged. You address both questions, explaining the value of foundational skills and the benefits of play for fitness, cooperation, and mental health. These relevant points meet the task well. To make the response more fully developed, explain the balance you recommend and support key claims with more specific examples. For instance, the hiking-trip example is relevant, but the link between trips and classroom play could be clearer; likewise, the claim that children become anxious or lose creativity could be explained with a concrete illustration. This would extend your ideas more consistently and make your argument more persuasive.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs on formal learning and play, and a conclusion. The contrast between “On the one hand” and “In contrast” helps readers follow the two sides, while “Moreover” and “For instance” signal additions and examples. This gives the essay a coherent progression. Some connections are less clear or mechanical, however. “Due to which” begins a fragment, and the hiking-trip example follows the claim about recreational activities without fully explaining the connection. The conclusion also repeats the main position rather than drawing the two strands together. Use linking phrases selectively, and make the relationship between each example and its supporting point explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “structured lessons,” “foundation,” “concentrate,” “co-operation,” and “recreational activities.” These choices communicate the main ideas, and there are some attempts at more specific language. However, the range and control are uneven: “formal learning” and “beneficial” recur, while several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, such as “work under a team,” “their future foundation,” and “their creativity level.” Spelling errors, including “prespective,” “readiing,” and “mathmatics,” also make the writing less polished. Build a wider set of accurate education-related phrases and check spelling and collocations carefully; this will make your meaning more precise and natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a conditional structure in “if children spend most of their time in studying…” and a relative clause in “which is also crucial…”. The overall meaning is generally understandable, but errors in agreement, verb forms, articles, and sentence construction remain noticeable. For example, “These skills provides” should use a plural verb, and “a child perform better” needs a singular verb. “However if…” also needs punctuation, while “Due to which their creativity level decreases” is not a complete sentence. Practise checking subject–verb agreement and ensure dependent clauses are attached to complete sentences. More accurate control of these structures would strengthen the range you are already attempting.

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