Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It is often argued that primary schools mostly focus on formal education. I thoroughly agree with the statement. Primary level education diffectly connected with the child's intellectual growth and it fosters creativity. I believe that, outcome- based education is pivotal for the students rather than just memorizing answers.

Mostly in the underdeveloped and developing countries, the pupils have less opportunities to learn things in an interactive way. Educators often follow the same methods of teaching they used to do one or two decades before. However, some institutions adapted new method of teaching, it has not become mainstream yet. Also, many tutors only focus on memorizing, and it hinders student's creativity. Also, the children are forced to perform better in the examinations no matter what, learning becomes secondary and result comes first. Policymakers need to introduce methods that are up-to-date and the learning process needs to be playful for the children.

Children are admitted into their preliminary educational institutions at a very early age. It is the time when their brain starts developing properly and they starts observing everything around them. If the children are pressurized for completing tasks, it would hamper their wellbeing and mental growth too. But if the students learn while playing, it would make them feel stressless and they can learn new things in a more faster way. So, primary school classroom should be the playground for the children where there will be many toys. It is crucial for the children to grow in an environment that is the safe place for their learning. Teachers might use diagrams, interesting pictures as well as singing songs or playing with the children would make the children more comfortable.

To sum up, a person's mental health and growth depends on how they were treated in their childhood. Primary school is the most crucial institution for them to learn different things through playing, and enjoying rather than just memorizing.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear: you strongly agree that primary schools overemphasise formal learning, and you address both the teaching approach and the value of play. Relevant points include the effect of memorisation on creativity and the possibility that learning through play can reduce pressure and help children learn. The examples of diagrams, pictures, songs and toys also respond directly to the classroom question. However, some ideas are asserted more than explained: for instance, the claim that play helps children learn “in a more faster way” would be stronger with a specific example of what they learn and how. The discussion of outdated teaching methods is also broad and focused mainly on developing countries. More balanced, specific support would make the response more fully developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction states your view, two body paragraphs develop concerns about formal teaching and the benefits of play, and the conclusion restates your position. Ideas generally progress in a sensible order, and linking expressions such as “However,” “But,” and “To sum up” help guide the reader. At times, though, cohesion is mechanical or repetitive. “Also” appears several times in close succession, and the repeated references to “children” and “learning” could be managed with clearer pronouns or more varied phrasing. Some links between claims are also abrupt—for example, the move from examination pressure to policymakers’ responsibilities. Use a wider range of precise transitions and make the relationship between each claim and its consequence explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for the topic, including “intellectual growth,” “memorizing,” “creativity,” “mental growth,” and “policymakers.” These choices communicate your main ideas, and some less common expressions show an attempt to be precise. However, several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “outcome-based education” in this context, “stressless,” and “the safe place for their learning.” There is also a spelling error in “diffectly,” and “preliminary educational institutions” is an awkward way to refer to primary schools. Aim for natural combinations and check spelling and word forms; this would make your meaning more precise and fluent without requiring more complicated vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including conditional structures such as “If the children are pressurized … it would hamper their wellbeing” and clauses beginning with “when” and “where.” This gives the response some structural variety, and the main message remains understandable. Some grammatical errors persist, however. For example, “the child’s intellectual growth” is followed by “it fosters,” creating an unclear reference; “they starts observing” has subject–verb disagreement; and “some institutions adapted …, it has not become mainstream” joins clauses incorrectly. Other examples include “less opportunities” and “primary school classroom should be the playground,” where plural and article choices need attention. Review agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries, and edit complex sentences to ensure each clause is correctly connected.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.