Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-02
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.0)
In this era, many people believe that primary schools pays so much attension on formal learning rather then focusing on childs ability to learn and grow. I partically believe that formal learning can be helpful for childldren but it can reduce or kill their ability to grow. Every humanbeing has different kind of abilities fourcing them to study same formate can be a waste of
their talent.
The most signinifecant reason, is that formal learning can effect those chidren
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 3.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0
The response begins to address the topic by stating a qualified view: formal learning can help children but may restrict their development. The point that children have different abilities also relates to the question. However, the response does not explain how important classroom play is, and it gives no supporting example or developed reason. It ends mid-sentence at “can effect those chidren,” so the argument is incomplete and the position is only partly established. The response is also 171 words below the required minimum, leaving too little content to address both questions adequately. To improve, answer each part directly, explain how play supports learning or development, and add a relevant example before reaching a clear conclusion.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0
There is a basic attempt to organise the response: an opening paragraph introduces the issue and the writer’s position, followed by a sentence beginning a reason with “The most signinifecant reason.” The ideas are broadly related to the topic, and “but” signals a contrast. However, the second paragraph stops before the reason is explained, so there is no clear progression or conclusion. The link between formal learning and children’s different abilities is asserted rather than developed, and the phrase “Every humanbeing…” does not clearly connect to a specific classroom example. Build a complete sequence of paragraphs—position, developed reasons and example, then conclusion—and use clear references and transitions to show how each point supports the answer.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.5
The response uses some topic-relevant vocabulary, including “formal learning,” “abilities,” “talent,” and “grow,” which makes the general subject understandable. There is also an attempt to express a nuanced idea through “helpful” and “reduce or kill.” However, the range is limited, and several spelling and word-form errors make the writing less controlled: “attension,” “partically,” “childldren,” and “signinifecant.” Some choices are also imprecise or informal; “kill their ability to grow” is stronger and less suitable for an academic argument than a measured phrase. Aim for accurate spelling and more precise terms for development and learning, and use vocabulary that describes the effects of play rather than relying on broad claims.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
The response attempts both simple and more extended sentence forms. For example, “I partically believe that formal learning can be helpful for childldren but it can reduce or kill their ability to grow” combines a position with a contrast, and “Every humanbeing has different kind of abilities…” attempts to explain a reason. However, grammatical control is inconsistent. In “primary schools pays,” the plural subject requires a plural verb; “different kind of abilities” also needs a determiner or plural construction. The opening sentence has an unclear structure around “rather then focusing,” and the final sentence is incomplete, ending with “those chidren.” Use complete sentences, check subject–verb agreement and articles, and practise joining clauses with clear, accurate punctuation.
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