Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

A few people argue that the focus of primary school system is more on the education rather than other activities like play.

Everyone has different perspectives few are more concerned about the formal education as its improves your knowledge and ability to know what is right or wrong for you otherwise few thinks other activities also play integral role in the growth of children and its improves their mental health.

On the one hand, formal learning is essential need in today’s society as without education you are nothing in the world of Artificial Intelligence.Students should focus on their studies at primary level because its like block-building if your base is not strong enough you can build the whole empire.It will improve their behavior how to respond to others and how to work with the different kinds of of personalities and in different work environment.The primary schools helps the children to achieve their dreams by motivating them and a give a way through which they can enhance their qualities by focusing on their studies.

On the other hand, other useful activities like playing games or doing activities which improve their physical health as well as mental health.These activities open their minds give them relaxation from their course curriculum and hectic routine it can result in multitalented students. It can balance out the whole schedule.

From my perspective , both are equally valuable for the children’s health and for the future.The schools needs to be balanced about the formal learning as its crucial for the future and add some playful activities ,few competitions which activates the minds of the children and they will become mentally and physically active persons in the future. So,the focus should be on both activities.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both parts of the question and make your position clear: formal learning matters, but play and other activities should also be included. The discussion of formal education gives relevant reasons, such as building a strong foundation and helping children develop social skills. You also explain that play can support physical and mental health and provide a break from routine. However, some points are asserted rather than fully explained. For example, the link between primary study and succeeding in an “Artificial Intelligence” world is unclear, and the benefits of competitions are mentioned without a specific example or explanation. Develop these ideas with concrete classroom examples and explain more directly how play supports learning.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, two contrasting body paragraphs signalled by “On the one hand” and “On the other hand,” and a concluding opinion. This makes the main line of argument easy to follow. However, some connections between ideas are mechanical or unclear. The opening paragraph moves quickly from differing perspectives to claims about knowledge and mental health, while the long first body paragraph combines social behaviour, work environments, dreams, and motivation without clear progression. Use topic sentences to establish each paragraph’s main point, then group supporting details around it. Clearer sentence boundaries and more precise references would also help readers follow how each example supports your position.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of vocabulary, including “formal learning,” “integral role,” “mental health,” “course curriculum,” and “multitalented,” which allows you to discuss education and children’s development. There are also attempts at less common expressions, such as “block-building” and “enhance their qualities.” However, several choices are unnatural or imprecise, including “focus … is more on the education,” “a give a way,” and “activities which improve their physical health as well as mental health.” Repetition of broad terms such as “activities,” “focus,” and “future” limits precision. Aim for natural collocations and more specific vocabulary—for example, name particular forms of play or skills children develop—while checking word forms and spelling.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentence forms, including a contrast between formal learning and play and a conditional idea in “if your base is not strong enough…” These attempts show some range, and the overall meaning is generally recoverable. However, some errors in agreement, articles, verb forms, and sentence boundaries remain. Examples include “Everyone has different perspectives few are…” (a comma splice), “the primary schools helps,” and “The schools needs.” The sentence beginning “It will improve their behavior how to respond…” also lacks a clear grammatical connection between the ideas. Practise separating independent clauses with full stops or suitable conjunctions, and check subject–verb agreement and article use when editing.

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