Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowdays , education is most important part for every child however primary school education is basic pillar of children's eduaction. Formal learning is part of every primary school to teach the pupils although schools should also focus outdoors activity for students. As per my view schools should focus equally on learning skills and outdoor playing activites , so students get a better experiance and enjoy both views.

Firstly, primary schools should mix the activities about formal learning and physical activites , so students can enjoy in both ways of learning. insititutes should focus equally in both activites. So it can help students get a physical development it helps children stays healthy and fit. In addition schools should also oraganize social group activites , so it can teach students how to communicate , co-operate and work as team. however these activites gives children a break fro, academic pressure and reduce their stress. Although it also helps to get better concentration short fun activies can improve student's attention and ineterest in studies.

Secondly , Formal eduaction is basic knowledge and academic that every children should develop such as reading , writing and mathematics. A better eduaction foundation get help to student to get a success in future higher classes. However discipline and responsibilty learned by student and buikd them perfectly for future hustle and gives them indea how to manages time and complete tasks. However basi science and mathematics languages kbolwgde gives them better understadning and problem-solving skills of the world and improve ability to understand things quickly.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both parts of the question and make your position clear: schools should give similar attention to formal learning and play. Relevant benefits are identified, including fitness, communication, cooperation, reduced stress and improved concentration. You also explain why academic foundations such as reading, writing and mathematics matter. However, the discussion of formal learning is more developed than the explanation of how play should be incorporated into classroom learning, and several points are asserted rather than illustrated. For example, the claim that short activities improve attention would be stronger with a specific classroom example. To develop the response further, explain more directly whether you agree that schools currently focus too much on formal learning, and support each main reason with a concrete example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has an overall structure, with an introduction followed by two body paragraphs, and the ideas generally relate to the topic. Sequencing words such as “Firstly,” “In addition” and “Secondly” help signal the direction of the discussion. However, the progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow: the first body paragraph moves quickly from physical development to social skills, stress and concentration without clearly connecting these points. “However” is also used repeatedly, including where the relationship between ideas is not a contrast. Some sentences are joined in ways that make their links unclear. Group related benefits together, use fewer but more precise linking expressions, and make each paragraph’s main point explicit before adding supporting details.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “formal learning,” “physical development,” “academic pressure,” “concentration” and “problem-solving skills.” This gives you enough language to communicate the main ideas. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or unclear, such as “enjoy both views,” “future hustle” and “get a success.” Spelling errors, including “eduaction,” “experiance” and “ineterest,” also make the writing less fluent to read. Aim to learn common word partnerships and check spelling carefully. More precise expressions would help you explain the relationship between play and learning without relying on repeated general words such as “activities” and “help.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentences, including clauses introduced by “although,” “so” and “however.” This shows an effort to connect ideas rather than relying only on short statements. However, control is inconsistent, and some sentence structures make the meaning difficult to follow. For example, “it helps children stays healthy and fit” has an incorrect verb form, while “A better education foundation get help to student” has problems with agreement and sentence construction. There are also issues with articles, plurals and punctuation, including inconsistent commas and spaces. Practise building accurate sentences around one main clause, then add a subordinate clause only when its relationship to the main idea is clear.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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