Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

There is an ongoing debate about whether formal learning is inordinately focused by primary schools. In my opinion I completely disagree with this statement and this essay will provide the justification for it.

On one hand, In current periods modern schools are not only giving theatrical knowledge on primary students but they also give them practical knowledge or social activity. There are many international schools that giving activity classes to students according to their interest in primary schools. Example, I have my nephew she is in second class and her interest has widely on swimming so her school provide swimming classes. Even in her schools lot of activity classes have run and tutor teach and support to every student to part on activity according to their interest.

On other hand, On my opinion primary school students are in period where they learn new things and improve their mind at that time if schools giving them only theatrical knowledge student maybe miss practical knowledge and they don't understand things or topic. Although, if we compare high school student with primary student they are easily or early understand the new things. Like the before summary, primary school student easily understanding their study and help in improve their mind or thinking power. Even student improve their physics and multi tasking skills.

In conclusion, recent days school have provide many physical or ground activity to improve their practical knowledge. On another topic I strongly discuss why primary students take part on ground activity with learning.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You state a clear view in the introduction—“I completely disagree”—and discuss both formal learning and the value of practical activities. The example of your nephew’s swimming lessons is relevant and helps illustrate how schools can offer learning beyond classroom theory. However, the response only partially answers the two questions: it does not explain clearly why formal learning is not excessive, and the importance of play alongside learning is asserted rather than fully argued. The second body paragraph repeats that practical knowledge and activities are useful, but gives little explanation or evidence. Develop each point with a clear reason and a specific example, and make the connection between play and children’s learning explicit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, so the reader can identify its broad structure. You also attempt to signal contrasts with “On one hand” and “On other hand.” However, ideas do not progress clearly: the second body paragraph repeats the value of practical learning without building a distinct argument, and the conclusion introduces “ground activity” without resolving the questions. Some linking phrases are inaccurate or mechanical, and references such as “the before summary” are unclear. Organise the body around separate points—whether schools overemphasise formal learning, then why play matters—and use straightforward links that show how each example supports the point.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “formal learning,” “practical knowledge,” “activity classes” and “multi tasking skills,” which helps communicate the general subject. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations make the meaning difficult to follow, such as “theatrical knowledge,” “in current periods,” and “part on activity.” Repetition of “primary school,” “knowledge” and “activity” also limits precision. Aim to use familiar, accurate expressions rather than forcing less suitable phrases: for example, distinguish “academic learning” from “practical skills,” and describe children as “taking part in activities.” Check word forms and spelling, including “multitasking,” to make your meaning clearer.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a conditional idea in “if schools giving them only theatrical knowledge student maybe miss practical knowledge.” However, complex structures are often faulty, and frequent errors in verb forms, agreement, articles and sentence construction can make the reader work to understand your meaning. For example, “there are many international schools that giving activity classes” needs a finite verb, while “her school provide” has a subject–verb agreement error. Capitalisation is also inconsistent, as in “On one hand, In current periods.” Practise building accurate basic sentences first, then add subordinate clauses with correct verb forms and punctuation.

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