Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Education plays an important part in any individuals life and it has become debatable subject among many groups of society. Many people believe that primary schools are spending too much time on students to give them knowledge about only formal learning. I largely disagree with this statement and this essay will provide justifications to support it.

To begin with, practical education is crucial to teach real life activities. To elaborate, some real life skills such as investing, treading and basic accounts are also important for scholars to learn during schooling. These type of skills are more applicable in real life and will make person's life easier. For example, students have a proper knowledge of academics but when they visit nearby bank they don't know how to fill the receipt or bank form and it can be really embarrassing. Therefore, schools should also focus on practical education not only formal leaning.

Another key factor is that teaching and participate in extra curricular activities is also vital for primary students. Athletic activities are important for student's physical health and they can learn more about leadership quality and multi-tasking as these activities are generally played in groups. To illustrate, during cricket and football match a person is constantly running or thinking about next move which can improve their physique as well as sharpen their brain. So, it is necessary to play and learn in the primary classroom.

To sum up, practical awareness can make leaners future life easier as they are leaning about real life skills and to learn and compete in sports activities can be beneficiary for person's physical health. therefore, It should be teach by authorities during early age.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is clear: you largely disagree that primary schools focus too much on formal learning, and you give relevant reasons involving practical skills and extracurricular activities. The examples of banking forms and team sports help illustrate these points. However, the response only partly develops the task’s central contrast. The first body paragraph argues for practical education, but does not explain clearly how this should balance formal learning; the second discusses sport, yet says little about the importance of play specifically within the classroom. The conclusion also introduces a recommendation without fully resolving how much formal learning is appropriate. Develop each point with a clearer link to the question and explain the balance you support.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion. Its progression from practical skills to extracurricular activities is easy to follow, and signposts such as “To begin with,” “Another key factor” and “To sum up” help readers recognise the stages of the argument. This meets the lower-band expectation of coherent organisation and shows some effective paragraphing. To make the progression more flexible and precise, strengthen the links between claims and their explanations: for example, clarify how the banking example supports your view about formal learning, rather than simply adding it after the claim. Some transitions, including “Therefore” and “So,” feel mechanical, and the conclusion repeats earlier points rather than drawing them together.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of topic vocabulary, including “practical education,” “leadership quality,” “multi-tasking” and “physical health,” and the reader can generally understand your intended meaning. There are also attempts to use more specific expressions, such as “basic accounts” and “formal learning.” However, noticeable word-choice, collocation and spelling errors limit precision: “treading” appears to be an inaccurate choice for a practical skill, “formal leaning” is misspelled, and “beneficiary” does not fit the intended meaning of beneficial. Phrases such as “teach real life activities” and “proper knowledge of academics” are also unnatural. Build accuracy by learning common word partnerships and checking spelling and word forms before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including a conditional-style example beginning “when they visit nearby bank” and a relative clause in “activities which are generally played in groups.” These structures help you explain and illustrate your ideas. However, control is inconsistent, particularly with articles, agreement, verb forms and sentence construction. For example, “any individuals life” needs a possessive form, “These type of skills” has a number-agreement error, and “It should be teach” uses the wrong verb form. The opening sentence also lacks an article before “debatable subject.” Some punctuation and capitalisation choices, such as the lowercase “therefore” after a full stop, need attention. Practise checking each sentence for a clear subject, correctly formed verb and appropriate articles.

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