Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The issue of what content should be included in the curriculum is a topic of significant debate. While some societal segments argue that primary schools should only concentrate on the formal education, others condend that the curriculum should include informal activities. Although formal learning is very crucial, I am of the opinion that learning should include other intertaining activities so that it becomes less boring.

On one hand, formal learning is very important for students in primary schools. Learners are introduced to broader concepts which help them to solve future problems. The formal curriculum is well designed to fit students need. It helps to induce critical thinking in pupils. Most schools in Zimbabwe concentrate more in formal learning and even teachers are rewarded according to their results from standadised assessments. This is helping the nation to produce a workforce with required skills and basic knowledge. However, formal learning only without playing is not enough to create a good learning environment.

This writer believe that learning should include games. Sometimes learning can be very boring, especially if the instructor is not good enough in motivating students. In this contemporary era, with the intervention of technology most schools are now utilising some online leaning applications which incorparate learning and playing, for instance Kahoot. Gamification of the classroom is helping in stimulating interest, almost all the students are now enjoying learning. Games help leaners clear up their minds and others might even forget personal challenges at home. Teachers are also beneficiaries since they are no longer the center of instruction.

In conclusion, learning should be interesting so that students get engaged. Curriculum makers must come up with more ways include playing in primary school learning.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear: you value formal learning but argue that play should also be included. You address both parts of the prompt, explaining the role of formal study and why games can make learning more engaging. The Kahoot example and reference to Zimbabwean schools help make the discussion relevant. However, the importance of play is developed more fully than the extent to which you agree that schools focus too much on formal learning. The point about assessment and workforce skills is useful, but it does not directly establish whether this emphasis is excessive. To strengthen the response, state your degree of agreement explicitly and support it with a more balanced comparison of the benefits and limits of formal instruction and classroom play.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs presenting formal learning and play, and a conclusion. The contrastive opening of the second paragraph and transitions such as “However” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the argument. The progression is generally logical, and each paragraph has a recognisable focus. Some links between ideas are less clear or feel abrupt: the claim that games help learners forget personal challenges at home is followed by the point about teachers no longer being central, without explaining the connection. The conclusion also repeats the general view rather than drawing together the two sides. More precise referencing and transitions that show how each example supports the main argument would make cohesion more flexible and less formulaic.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for the topic, including “formal curriculum,” “critical thinking,” “standardised assessments,” and “gamification.” These choices allow you to discuss education and classroom methods with some specificity, and the meaning is generally clear. There are, however, several spelling errors and inaccurate word choices, such as “condend,” “intertaining,” “standadised,” and “incorparate.” Some expressions are also awkward or imprecise, including “concentrate more in formal learning” and “induce critical thinking.” These issues show attempts at more specialised language but reduce naturalness. Check spelling carefully and learn common collocations as complete phrases; for example, schools typically “focus on” learning and activities “develop” critical thinking.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including a concession in the introduction (“Although formal learning is very crucial…”) and a conditional structure (“if the instructor is not good enough…”). Most sentences communicate their meaning, and the paragraphing helps contain the effect of errors. Some grammatical problems remain, particularly with agreement, articles, and sentence construction. For example, “This writer believe” needs subject–verb agreement, while “students need” requires a possessive form in “students’ needs.” The final sentence, “Curriculum makers must come up with more ways include playing,” is missing a grammatical link before “include.” Review agreement and possessives, and practise using infinitive patterns such as “ways to include.” Greater accuracy across these structures would improve control.

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